


Ethan's Hunch

by Boochie48



Category: Chicago Med, Chicago PD (TV), Ethan choi - Fandom
Genre: Chicago Med - Freeform, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-30
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:47:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 20
Words: 28,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28434867
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Boochie48/pseuds/Boochie48
Summary: He loved April from a distance she was his solace only one thing stood in his way Tate. Something in her relationship with Tate did not sit well with Ethan. Not just because he was in love with her but because he just had a hunch he could not shake. He was going to get to the bottom of it. Reviews are welcome
Relationships: Ethan Choi/April Sexton, Ethan Choi/Jay Halstead, Kim Burgess/Adam Ruzek, Maggie Lockwood/Original Female Characters, Trudy Platt & Hank Voight
Comments: 111
Kudos: 8





	1. Chapter 1

Ethan has always had April locked away in a special place in his heart. A heart that he kept very guarded and that most people at the hospital thought was reserved and distant an excellent doctor none the less. He knew he wasn't that person. He knew he had warmth in his heart for that special woman. He knew that he loved to laugh, have fun, and enjoy life but having PTSD after his tours in the Middle East surely changed him inside. He worked hard to keep his stolen glances beneath the surface sometimes she would catch them and smile back. Sure they worked great together; sure they were great friends outside of the ED they all were. She was different than other women he had crossed paths with. She had a zeal and spark that drew people in like a moth to a flame and yup he was one of those people.

There was one major thing holding him back from gaining the courage and telling her how he really felt. Her Asshole of a boyfriend Tate, he looked like a perfect guy on the outside. The way he would pick her up and drop her off, the way she would invite him to the department festivities. They always had a ball. They always appeared perfect. But Ethan had this nagging twinge in his gut that told him there was something amiss. Chalk it up to his vast military expertise it was a feeling that he just could not shake. He hoped and prayed he was wrong, for April's sake. He tried to push his suspicions away he was great when they were on the clock the hustle and bustle of the ED was a great distraction. It was in his off time, that his thoughts wandered to her and Tate.

"Good Morning Mags" Ethan chimed as he walked into the ED for his shift on Monday morning.

She waved back in response she seemed really caught up in the conversation she was having on the phone. He went into the locker room to change into his scrubs.

"Dr. Choi I am updating your schedule for this week you are getting another nurse April called out sick for a few days."

Maggie spoke as he pulled his shirt over his head.

"She was fine yesterday. What's wrong with her? This is totally out of her character she never missed a day."

His concern was very visible.

"She said she thinks she has a stomach bug that's been going around so I told her to take the day and Tate is away on business so she is laying low and staying by the bathroom"

She smiled and left the room to start her shift.

It seemed like his shift dragged on for way longer than it should have. She was in the forefront of his mind. Which was a recipe for disaster and he knew it. His focus should be and needed to be on his patients. He knew without a doubt he was going to check on her as soon as his shift was over.

April stood naked in front of her full length mirror. Her heart broke as she looked at the damage he had done. When did it get this bad? First it was little arguments over her job. He didn't think she should be so devoted to her job. The little tiffs grew into shouting matches over time. Soon it was everything she did that had anything to do with the hospital. They were her family she drove that point home to him over and over. She hated the way she would smack on a fake happy mask at gatherings with her friends and at work. She never thought she would be that woman. The ones she would try so hard to convince to seek help when they would come into the ED battered, bruised, violated and ashamed. His death grips on her arm at gatherings his demanding to always be with her when they all hung out. It graduated from grips to shoves to hiding her car keys to pushes and shoves. This morning it all came to a head. He wanted to make love before she left for work. She was already running late as it was and he wasn't letting it go.

"Tay I am going to be late babe"

She said as he pulled her back into bed.

"I do not care I keep telling you to quit that fucking job."

He held her from behind as she sat with her back to him on the side of the bed.

"I am a nurse it is my duty to help people. No one is going to make me change that Tate you know that."

She felt empowered like she was standing up for her whole ED family when she defended her career. Sadly he didn't see it that way.

He grabbed her hair on the back of her head and pulled her back flat down to the bed from her seated position.

"OWWWW she yelled let me go you are hurting me please stop"

She begged and pleaded. He did not care about her begging. He was fed up with coming in second to that damn hospital. He grabbed her face as he laid on top of her he squeezed her face so hard she swore he was going to break her jaw.

He snatched her robe open and took what he wanted from her roughly like always he was never gentle and compassionate. She would lay there and wait for it to be over holding her breath and scared to move. When he was done she scrunched her robe closed and tried to salvage what was left of her pride.

"You care so fucking much about that place you didn't even want to please me before I left. And you thought that shit was fucking cool?"

He yanked her up off of the bed by her arms she knew they would bruise they were his favorite place to assault besides her legs. He never hit her in the face. His secret would be out if he did. She felt the sting not only on her arms but in her heart. Roughly he kissed her and whispered in her ear

"You better not miss one of my fucking calls remember I know your work schedule so I know when you should be picking up that phone."

Just like that he left her apartment. She stood there in shock afraid to breath she was thankful he did not have a key to her place she could at least be prepared when he got back into town he couldn't just come strolling in when he wanted. She took a scalding hot shower to cleanse herself. She dried off and tried to hide the hurt in her eyes that was coming up. It was then she decided to call out.

"He is gone for the week I will stay in the house all week I have plenty of food, and cable TV I can't concentrate on work right now. And I damn sure don't want to see Ethan right now"

She called Maggie right then.

She spent the day in bed between crying and sleeping before she knew it was dark out. It seemed lately the only thing that held her together was the thoughts of Ethan. She would often catch his glances that lasted a little longer than they should. She loved that she could be herself with him. He never looked down on her because she was a RN and not a MD. He valued her opinion, insights on cases and respected her at all times. That was one of the things she loved about him. She got up and from bed and flopped in front of the TV. As she flipped through the channels, her doorbell rang.

She sat frozen on the couch

"Maybe they will leave if I am really quiet"

She thought to herself

"April it is me Ethan I heard you were sick I am just checking on you"

It was then he called her phone.

"Fuck she whispered"

Of course it wasn't on silent as it buzzed and played Cardi B "I Like It Like That" across her coffee table her new favorite song.

She tied her long sleeved robe super tight she had on shorts and a tank but she surely couldn't let her legs and arms show.

"Coming Dr. Choi"

She opened the door and smiled softly as best she could in her metal state. There he stood with a shopping bag full of ginger ale, crackers, and ingredients for soup.

"First of all April it is Ethan we are not at work."

He smiled as he walked in went right to the kitchen and unpacked.

"Operation get you better has begun"

He looked at her and smiled through his coifed hair that he let down after worked she was instantly pulled in damn he was sexy she thought to herself.

"You didn't have to do this I am ok at least I will be E"

She was so afraid that he would find out her shameful secret but relieved that he was there all the same she had to leave the room to hide her uneasiness. Before she knew it they laughed and talked and ate his wonderful soup and totally lost track of time. It was close to 11pm. Like clockwork her phone rang and of course she knew it was him.

"Are you ok April hello April"

Ethan noticed her whole body tense as she froze briefly

"You want to get that?"

"Uh yea excuse me"

She went upstairs and into her bedroom.

Almost a half hour passed and she still hadn't come back down he didn't feel weird about going upstairs in her home he had been there a zillion times. He was worried about her at this point for someone with a stomach bug she had not went the bathroom the whole time he was there. He could her side of a very heated conversation from all the way downstairs. She was doing a lot apologizing. It was obvious it was Tate on the line.

Her bedroom door was ajar and he could hear the soft crying from within.

"April are you ok?"

He knocked softly as she tried to wipe her face and hide her tears.

"Yea sorry that was rude of me to be gone for so long"

"No needs to be sorry are you ok do you want to talk about it?"

He asked as he walked to her he approached from behind and placed his hand on her shoulder she instantly winced in pain with a slight flinch.

"I am fine just a small misunderstanding between Tay and I that's all."

She tried to deflect as she walked around him.

It was then he decide to step out on faith and call it like he saw it if he was wrong great because this was not a time where he wanted to be right at all.

"When did it start April?"

He asked her barely above a whisper as he stepped in front of her and softly held her hands.

She automatically froze at his touch. Sure they touched a zillion times at work and hanging out but this was different. This time she felt his warmth and concern for her wellbeing. But she could not find her voice to admit anything. She just stood there ashamed, embarrassed, and scared.

"You know you can tell me anything right? So many times you save my ass and have my back. You are the main reason I make it through my day. No matter how hard my day is in ED no matter what case triggers my PTSD I know I get to look into those eyes and see that warm soul behind those eyes and I know it will be ok. Please let me be there for you."

Never had Tate or any man for that matter hold her in that regard. That was the most beautiful thing she had ever heard from a man. She knew then he was her safe place her solace.

She let his hand go and slowly undid her robe and let the satin fabric slide from her battered frame. It seemed like all the air had been sucked out of his lungs he couldn't find his words. He couldn't find his breath. Had this been a different time or moment this would be the beginning of an all-night lovemaking session. She hung her head in shame as she slowly found her voice.

"Ethan I need help she whispered as she looked at her feet."

He didn't lash out in anger even though he was going to kill Tate. He didn't yell or lash out in a fit of rage like he could have. He picked her up bridal style and carried her over to her bed. He laid her down took off his shoes, belt, phone, and wallet. He then climbed in bed next to her and cradled her as she sobbed in his arms.

"It will be ok April we will get through this. I am here and I am not going anywhere. Do you hear me?"

She nodded against his chest as she slowly cried herself to sleep. Of course he was wide awake all damn night thinking how and why her. Why any woman for that matter.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He loved April from a distance she was his solace only one thing stood in his way Tate. Something in her relationship with Tate did not sit well with Ethan. Not just because he was in love with her but because he just had a hunch he could not shake. He was going to get to the bottom of it. Reviews are welcome

Ethan lay staring at the ceiling the clock read 4:30 am he dozed once or twice at most so far. His body is trained to sleep on limited time due to his military training coupled with his PTSD not to mention the stress of the current job. April tossed and turned since she cried herself to sleep hours ago. Every once in a while she would let out a mournful murmur in her sleep. But she always managed to find herself back in Ethan arms safe and protected.

"No please Tay stop you are hurting me."

She mumbled in her sleep.

Ethan opened his eyes from his latest nod. He listened and watched her intently. He knew the most important thing was to reassure her while she was asleep that she was safe and secure.

"April you are safe. Open your eyes beautiful. You are with Ethan not Tate."

He kept repeating that and rubbing her back while holding her hand with his free hand. He had experience with this type of situation, and sure enough she rolled on her back and opened her eyes she pulled her comforter up over her and blinked away her tears. Ethan turned to face her. He had a question he wanted to ask her but it was never easy when he asked a patient this question.

"April I want to ask you something is that ok?"

She nodded yes as she tried to even out her breaths.

"Did he ever force himself on you?"

She folded like a house of cards on a shaky table she didn't even try to avoid the answer. She knew the road to recovery started with 100% honesty with her and him.

"Um yea over the past few months he cared less and less about my feelings and comfort in the bedroom. But today was the worst. I know I shouldn't blame myself but this time I really fucked up E."

"How do you figure that?"

He spoke softly but firmly he saw this too many times to count self-blame from the victim.

She started to explain

"When I am super exhausted I talk in my sleep. This was apparently one of those times. I got up to let Tay in around 1am and went right back to sleep. Next thing I know it was morning. I had overslept I shoot right up to get ready for work and he stopped me telling me that he wanted to make love before he left town. I was telling him I was going to be late but he didn't care. He started with his usual quit that fucking job mantra. As I went to get up again, he grabbed me by my hair and pulled me back down on the bed. He said he had something for me to watch".

She took a long pause in her story. The most he could deduct was she was trying to gather the courage to continue.

Her pause was more about her embarrassment to what her story would reveal about Ethan than what actually happened to her.

"I was too nervous to move while he let my hair go to get his phone off of my dresser. He played a video of me asleep."

"Ok that's no reason to lash out the way he did April why would he record you sleeping?"

"I was apparently dreaming in the video and clear as day there I was calling out for you, and moaning your name in my sleep. I got up out of the bed and I tried to apologize but before I could get it out he threw me down and took what he wanted. My bumps and bruises will heal but you really want to know what killed me inside Ethan? When he was on top of me he just kept grunting in my ear the same thing over and over."

She was not sure how Ethan would feel after hearing her next revelation. She swallowed down the bile that rose in throat and spit it out much like ripping off a Band-Aid.

"Let's see if that china man still wants you when I am done with you."

There she got it out. It was no taking it back now. It was in the atmosphere. Nowhere for it to go but right into his ears. She laid there too embarrassed to look at him, for more than one reason.

He sat up against her head board, silent he knew his response was crucial in their relationship and in her road to recovery.

"April can you sit up and look at me please?"

He asked softly and she nervously obliged her thoughts were everywhere

"Nothing you did was wrong do you understand me? You can't control your sleep process and you know that April this is totally on him. There is nothing you can say to me that would make me leave your side through this or any thing for that matter. I know how hard it was for you to reveal that to me obviously for more than one reason. Guess what I am still here."

He took her hands in his and kissed them softly.

She sat quietly and reflective thinking of something to say.

No matter how hard she tried she couldn't shake the urge she was having being so close to him this way being in her bed all be it not the way she dreamt about when she called out his name but he was there none the less.

They sat in a comfortable silence for a moment. Before he slid back down with her into the bed. They laid there facing each other.

"April I know how important it is for domestic violence and rape victims to regain a semblance of control in their lives. So I want to ask you how you want to handle this situation. Do you want to press charges, get a restraining order, change the locks, or just break it off with him and begin the healing process? I will not pressure you in any particular direction. Whatever you want to do I will be by your side always. That is as long as you want me to I do not want to overstep my boundaries."

Her eyes began to water. His kindness and compassion for her was mind blowing to her. She always knew she deserved better than what she had with Tate but she didn't how she got to this shitty pit stop in her life.

"Please do not cry he whispered."

As he wiped her tears she leaned into his strong hand. His hands that saved lives on a daily basis and now apparently was saving hers. She grabbed his hand as it rested on her face she welcomed his touch it was a peaceful feeling.

She didn't know how it happened or when it did but before she knew it she leaned in and kissed him with all of the passion and emotion she had in her. She dreamed of what this would be like. What he would taste like. How his lips felt as she gently sucked on them with just enough suction.

He couldn't believe what was happening he laid awake at night imagining about her lips her mouth, her touch, how she tasted. He wrapped his arms around her as she pressed her body onto his. She moaned into his mouth. That alone almost pushed him over the edge. She ran her hand through his hair as he ran his hand down her back he stopped right at the swell of her perfect shaped ass.

"April"

he panted into the openness of her mouths

"I have always wanted you."

He leaned his forehead against hers. She bit on her bottom lip as she caught her breath.

"I have wanted you for so long too E but..."

"No buts April"

He stopped her mid-sentence this time he took the lead on the kissing. He held her close to his chest she could feel his sculpted muscles against her body. She panted into his mouth. She pulled his shirt over his head as she kissed down his chest and let her tongue flick over his perfect nipples. he put his hands in her wild tousled hair and let his eyes roll back into his head he was so hard he didn't think it humanly possible to be so erect he knew she felt it through his pants.

In that brief second he regained his senses.

"April he gasped wait we have to stop."

He reached down and grabbed her face and brought it back up to his.

She instantly figured she did something wrong.

"Omg I am so sorry this is so embarrassing."

She rolled off of him.

He placed his finger on her lips.

"You have no need to apologize. Trust me I want you just as bad as you want me. I stopped because I don't want this to be our first time. I want our first time to be amazing and romantic. I want nothing but to take my time and show you how you should be touched and loved. I want you to cry tears of ecstasy not tears of embarrassment and pain. You need time to heal and trust again."

She knew he was right. She curled into his side she kissed his neck and he kissed her forehead.

"To answer your question from earlier I want to get a restraining order for protection and I don't want to go back to work right now it's too many ears and tongues wagging. I will call Maggie in a few hours and invite her over to explain everything and tell her I need to take a leave of absence for a few weeks. Will you stay with me while I talk to her?"

"I sure will babe"

It came out before he could stop it. It was like second nature it felt right.

"April I am sorry I shouldn't have called you that."

"No it is ok I like it"

There they laid in silence until they both drifted off once again.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3 

It was 7:45 April felt the bright morning sun invading her much needed sleep. She sat up and realized she was in the bed alone. Her heart sank, did Ethan leave? Did her mountain of disfunction and drama give him a change of heart? She rubbed the empty side of the bed where he was hours ago and the sheets where cold. Her cell blaring broke her from her thoughts it was surely Tate his morning check in. Not thinking anything of it she answered and put the call on speaker. 

"Yes Tay" she spoke coldly. 

"Do you miss me baby because I miss you." 

April rolled her eyes and stood up out of the bed without answering right away. 

"How is your conference going?" 

That was a crappy attempt at changing the subject she thought to herself. 

"Don't beat me over the head with the bullshit. I know what you're doing. If I was there right now and asked you that question, you know exactly what I would do if you tried to change the subject. Now I asked you do you miss me?" 

"Yes YesTay I do" 

she stammered he had this weird power lately. He was able to make her feel like she was a diminutive shell of a woman. She had no power or self worth its like he sucked it right out of her. 

"Why do you have to make me be the bad guy April? Why can't you just behave and let me take care of you?" 

She sighed ran her hands over her face and sat back on the bed. 

Meanwhile 

Ethan was just getting back from the cafe a few block from Aprils townhouse. She would often pick up thier breakfast pastries as a treat on the way to work. He loved waking up with her in his arms. He knew he could very easily become addicted to wanting her. She was finally sleeping soundly when he got up he didn't want to break her rest who knows the last time she slept so soundly. With Mags coming by later he made sure to get enough for everyone to enjoy. He also stopped and picked up a small bouquet of wildflowers for her coffee table. Once the pastries where arranged on the tray he wrapped them and got the coffee brewing and was heading back upstairs to check on her. 

Thats when Tate harsh voice broke through the morning tranquil vibe that Ethan was trying to set. He didn't like being in the position to ease drop but he couldn't help but hear because he left the bedroom door open and she must've had the phone on speaker. 

"Why do we keep having this conversation Tate I didn't make you anything. Why are you so different now? It's like I do not know you anymore." 

"Bitch please you know why. You killed my baby in that fucking hospital. I bet you if it was Mr. Chong Chong baby you wouldn't have got rid of it. You know what I will and will not tolerate. Girl you better be glad I am not there right now!" 

"Tate please, how many times are you going to make me relive that. It was not my fault i lost the baby. I went for my checkup during lunch and there was no heartbeat. I couldn't wait for you to get back into town. I had to have the procedure right away. The only person that knows to this day is Mags. She covered for me and kept my secret. Are you ever going to stop blaming me?" 

She yelled through her tears. 

"The Doctor said there was nothing that I did wrong why don't you believe me?"  
She rubbed her stomach. and cried even harder. There baby died 6 months ago she was just starting her second trimester. Thats when things really got dark in thier relationship. She thought back to that day, she refused to be pulled back there. Just the thought of what he would be doing to her right now if he was there chilled her. She knew her next statement would restart the toxic roller coaster she couldn't seem to get off. 

"Tay I have to get ready for work I have to go." 

He hated the fact that she would always bring that place up. That place was everything that was going wrong in his life. It took his baby and was trying to take his woman.

Ethan forgot about the coffee as he sat at the bottom of the steps in utter shock. She was pregnant and went through one of the most tragic moments a woman can go through. All Tate was doing was punishing her for it. 

"Well now I'm sweetie just because you wanna run and be with Mr. China man and all the other runway models who play doctor! What boggles my mind is out of all the hospitals in the Chi you work at the one hospital where all the male Docs look like fucking male models!" 

"Don't call him that he is Japanese not Chinese. Tate that is very racist of you. I do not care what you do to me I don't care how many times we argue or fight, I will always defend my friends." 

"Get the fuck out of here friends my ass. More like defend Ethan. Face it you want him and he probably already had you. Wait until I get back from New York next week you will learn girl you will learn." 

With that last statement the line went 

Ethan couldn't believe how bad this actually was. He sat in disbelief, that bastard threatened her and even still she defended him to Tate. He pulled out his phone text Mags and asked her to meet at Aprils house by noon. She responded immediately with a no problem she didn't even ask why. That was how deep thier friendship ran. 

April couldn't seem to stop her tears as she took the flowered print box out of her nightstand drawer. It contained the ultrasound pictures of her baby. 

"I am so very sorry I never got to meet you little one Please forgive me." 

Ethan walked into the room with two cups of coffee and watched her. She was staring at her ultrasound pictures with one hand on her stomach. 

"Goodmorning" 

he spoke up softly she almost jumped out of her skin.

" Ethan I thought you left." 

"I didn't want to wake you. I went to pick up pastries from that Cafe you turned me on to. I put them out for you and Maggie to eat later. I also text her she will be here at 12, and I made some coffee." 

Her hands worked in a flurry to gather the little black and white pictures all while wiping her eyes and trying to get her self together. He watched her tremble and obviously uncomfortable body language. He saw the ultrasound pictures but if she wasn't ready to discuss it with him then he wouldn't push it she would open up when she was ready. 

They sat in silence she started to calm down and take slower breaths. 

"Thank You for sticking up for me." 

he broke the silence. 

"Oh God you heard him!" 

She belted out in embarrassment. She fell back and pulled the comforters over her head. 

He walked over to the side of the bed that he slept on last night. Kicked off his shoes and took the blanket off of her head. 

"While I am appreciative of you defending me to him, I do not need you to do so. I do not give two fucks what he says about me or what he calls me. What I do care about is you. What you think and how you feel. It is time for me to stick up for you." 

He laid on his left side propped up on his elbow facing her. She was in the same position but on her right. He brushed her hair out of her eye and cupped her cheek. She turned her head a little and kissed the palm of his hand. 

"He will never touch you or hurt you again. Look at me April. I mean it, I will kill him if he lays another hand on you" 

She didn't respond to his last statement out loud but just from knowing his personality coupled with his military experience she knew he meant it and that scared her. 

He wrapped her back up in his arms just like she was hours before. Her mouth was right by his ear in the nook of his neck. Her warm breath was making it really hard to stay focused on helping her heal. Out of nowhere she leaned over him and kissed him with just as much passion as the first time they kissed. It was like he knew her body instinctively for years. He rolled her over and devoured her neck, ear, and lips. her full soft lips kept calling him in. She reached behind and dug her nails through his shirt that drove him wild. 

"god April I want you so bad." 

She reached down and in one swift motion her shirt was off and there she lay under him with most perfect breast he had ever seen. He took her perfectly hard nipples into his mouth as she arched her back off of the bed. 

He kissed and licked his way down to her belly button. Suddenly he stood and took off the rest of his clothes. He felt like he was possessed, like he wasn't in control of his body like she put a Brazilian voodoo spell on him. He couldn't break eye contact with her. She slid off her shorts, her last piece of clothing. He kissed her in places that were bruised. He worked his way up until he was lost in her eyes again. 

She grabbed his hair and pulled him down to her as she wrapped her long firm legs around his back. That allowed his very firm erection to stand at her wetness. 

"April I want you so bad it hurts. But please don't think you have to prove something to me you have been through so much physically. I don't want you to rush this or us. Like I said before I want our first time to be free of his shadow. I want you to fully let your guard down and not have that dickhead looming and lurking in the back of your mind baby. I want you to have total control of your body and what happens to it. Once we take this next step I know I will not be able to ever let you go. Are you sure you ready for me, this, us?" 

She blinked away the tears that were running back into her ears. She trembled under him from the thoughts of what next week held. She wanted this so bad. She needed him. She always wanted him. 

She locked eyes with him, reached down in between her legs grabbed his long thickness and slowly lined him up with her opening. 

"Please take his touch away Ethan. Make me forget." 

That was it for him. He slowly slid into her he just about melted feeling, her open for him. He studied her face he feared blinking. He didn't want to miss a second of looking at her. He gave her a moment to adjust to his size. April whimpered as he filled her. 

"Ohhhhhh Ethan yes please" 

She stammered through her words. As he cupped her breast with one hand he reached down and lifted one of her legs for a deeper stroke. 

He tried to take it slow he never wanted this to end. Nope not possible he thought to himself. 

"Fuck he grunted out you feel so good April." 

Without warning he picked her up so they sat face to face . With her straddling him The change in her positioning gave him a deeper feel inside of her and it drove both of them insane. 

"Ethan" 

she cried out in his face 

"ohhhhh please please oh" 

They kissed frantically as if someone was going snatch them away from each other never to be seen again. rhythmic bounces of her taking all of him shocked him. Other partners in his past mainly Vicki often complained about his girth. She had no problem taking all of him. 

He held her close as he fell into a steady rhythm. She panted in his ear as she held on. He grabbed her hair from behind and pulled her head back gently exposing her long neck. He licked and sucked on her neck and chest. Without warning to her surprise he pulled out of her and turned her onto her stomach. He quickly slid right back into her. He fit into her perfectly. He took her arms and held them above her head swept her hair to the side, as he kissed and licked her back and neck. His pace started to quicken, he knew he wouldn't last long. That's when he felt her body stiffen. Almost simultaneously the atmosphere shifted in the room. 

"No no no!" 

she whimpered into the pillow under her once she turned her head it got louder. Next she started to struggle under him. He instantly knew what was going on it was what he was afraid of. He released her immediately and scrambled off of her. 

She jumped up screaming at Ethan while she rubbed her wrists frantically. 

"Tate" 

She kept repeating his name and backing up towards the wall. Ethan got up and slowly walked towards her. She was terrified, he had to break her train of thought from the fight flight freeze. She was definitely in the flight phase. He knew in order to bring her back to the present moment he would have to implement mindfulness tactics. 

"April baby hear my voice you know I am Ethan you are here with me. Listen to my voice. focus on my voice." 

he slowly crept towards her. She was going to rub her wrist raw if she was any stronger. 

"Look at my face April look in my eyes I want you to do something with me ok? I am going to point to my tattoos one by one you are going to count them for me out loud, and I will tell you the the story behind it." 

Almost 45 minutes had passed as they sat on her floor in the same spot she backed into 5 tats later her panic attack was a memory. 

"Thats Tate favorite position." 

She whispered 

"He loves to hold my arms above my head on my stomach. He says its his way of making me remember he is in control." 

She blinked through her tears.. 

"I loved every moment of what just happened you made me feel so wanted you were amazing. But when you turned me over, in a flash in my mind it wasn't the beautiful passionate experience with the man I have been in love with for years it was him raping me and I freaked out Ethan I am so sorry I ruined that special first time between us I should have listened to you. I wanted to forget and erase his hold on me so bad that I rushed my body into something my mind wasn't ready for." 

He stood up and gestured for her hand so she could follow suit. 

"Do not apologize. I should have more self control to begin with. You didn't do anything wrong. Can I do something if its ok?" 

"I trust you completely and totally Ethan you know that I always will. My only request is you be patient with me. I am a mess right now emotionally. Nobody but you knows and soon Mags. My family especially my papi and Noah can never know the shame would be unbearable." 

She sighed at the thought of her family knowing. 

He looked at the clock on her nightstand he had just enough time. He disappeared into her master bath she heard the water running as she put her robe on and sat on the bed. He walked to her and took her hand, there she stood looking at the huge bubble bath he ran for her. 

"There are many other ways to erase his touch from your body and mind besides sex. Baby Let me help you erase him. 

He stepped in the huge sunken whirlpool tub that she had. Coming from a weathly family had its perks. She had this specially ordered there is no way that tub came with this townhouse. He reached for her hand, she took her robe off and stepped in the water so hot and soothing he sat behind her with space in between them and started to wash her long thick locks of hair. While the conditioner sat he switched his position to be face to face with her. 

"Can I?" 

He asked with her loofah puff and mango body wash in his hands. He knew she loved all tropical fruits. It seemed like she had every fruity lotion, body butter, body wash, shampoo, perfume, and candles ever made. She nodded as he gently lathered up her torso she reciprocated and washed him at the same time. 

"This is the most relaxed I have been since I got with Tate. You have to stop this Ethan I am going to get spoiled." 

"I am fine with you being spoiled as long as I am the one doing the spoiling." 

She put her hands in the water and accidentally brushed against his cock. He was completely hard again. She felt so bad for ruining the wonderful love making session. He drew in a quick breath from her simple touch. He knew they had a schedule to keep and his sex drive couldn't take another high low dive today. 

"Baby we have to get ready its almost 11:30 Mags is gonna be here soon and if you keep grazing by my cock I will loose it instead of a hot bath maybe we should have took cold showers." 

He kissed her and they got ready for Mags. 

She sat nervous sipping the coffee that she reheated, Staring out of the window. 

She decided to put on a pair of shorts and a T back tank top. Ethan had on a pair of ball shorts and a tee shirt he was never without his overnight bag he kept one in the car at all times. Being in the military and a ER Dr. trained him to always be prepared. 

"She is gonna see these bruises and loose it Ethan." 

Before he could respond Mags rang the bell. Ethan got up kissed April. 

"You will get through this with us by your side." 

With that he opened the door.


	4. Maggie knows

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maggie finally knows everything good and bad.

"Hey Ethan" 

She kissed him on the cheek and walked further into the room. 

"April sweetie I didn't know you were feeling so bad that you had to call Ethan. Where is Tate is he away on business again?" 

She plopped her purse on the end table and walked up to April who was sitting on the far end of the sofa. 

"Do you have a fever are you keeping anything on your stomach?" 

Ethan followed behind Maggie and waited for April to respond. 

"Maggie I have to tell you something thats really hard for me." 

Her voice started to crack as she stood as Ethan walked towards her and took her hand. 

"I am here and so is Mags you can do this baby" 

Maggie was 100% lost at what she saw in front of her. April walked to Maggie. 

"I am sorry for blurting this out but if I don't get it out now I won't have the courage to do it again.Tate has been beating and raping me." 

Maggie froze in place did time just stop because that's what she felt like. 

"What did you just say?" 

She stammered and walked toward April as she approached her the brusies came into view. Without saying a word she scooped under April arms and held her for what seemed like an eternity. Ethan stepped back to let them have thier moment. He went to get the coffee pot and mugs. 

The dear friends discussed everything that had gone wrong in Aprils life. Maggie cried more than once so did April. 

"When did it start April?" 

Maggie inquired 

"When I got pregnant he changed. He complained every time I had to work. I thought he was just being protective. Everything changed the day of the appointment." 

Maggie hung her head she knew the day well. 

"The day you lost the baby?" 

Ethan asked, Maggie and April nodded 

"He was at a conference in Seattle for 2 weeks. I was squeezed in on my lunch as a favor. He was pissed that I had the appointment without him. When I didn't hear the heartbeat I asked Stacey to turn up the volume. She paused for a second looked at me, then the screen. I knew right then what was wrong." 

"And thats when I saw you on the schedule for the DNC." 

He was due back that night. I told him about the baby and the procedure when he got to my place. He lost it which is to be expected. Its The way he lost it that was the problem it wasn't grief and sadness it was anger and rage towards me. It was like all of this pinned up animosity for us and what we do to save lives had awakened like a volcano. He accused me of killing his baby. I showed him the discharge papers I showed him all the proof I had that I didn't do anything wrong. I even tried explaining from the medical standpoint, it wasn't enough. Thats when he shoved me the first time. Everytime work came up he would show more anger. I didn't take any time off to recover. I had to stay busy to keep the thoughts away. So I buried myself in my work." 

"Yea remember how I was mad at you for not taking time off." 

Maggie recalled 

"Remember when I picked up extra shifts to help my friend get her car fixed Ethan?" 

"Yea you were like a robot. Every shift I worked you were already there hours before me and we have identical shifts. Then the car came through the Er the following week you almost got killed do you know how bad you scared me baby? How did you not have a nervous breakdown?" 

"I said the same thing E." 

Maggie interjected 

"Honestly I felt like I had no reason not to put my life on the line. My baby was dead my fiancé hated me, you know what 2 things stick out the most? How bad my back hurt from fighting him the night before and how much worse it was when he found out about the car. He tried to get me pregnant again so bad after a while I just blocked the sex out. I am secretly on the pill. He would kill me if he knew. There is no way in hell I would start a family with him now. So the question that has tormented me all these months is did my baby die because Tate wasn't meant to be the father? Its like fate knew this was going to happen his ugly evilness was bound to be exposed and maybe it was a blessing that my baby went to heaven." 

She Sobbed in Maggie's arms briefly her breakdowns where short and came in spurts. 

"I feel like i am in the twilight zone. He was always so nice and fun around us I had no idea. We are trained to catch shit like this. I feel so bad I failed my sister. I will do anything you need me to do sweetie. Don't you worry that mother fucker better not come near you! 

Maggie was like a woman on speed she was so keyed up to help fix whatever it was that her sister needed fixing. 

"I have the same vigor coursing through my veins Mags believe me even if I wasn't head over heels in love with April Sexton for years. Even if she was just a friend I would want him dead." 

Maggie stopped dead in her tracks of pacing and ranting and turned to face Ethan who was picking at a muffin from the cafe. 

She wagged her finger in his face with the other hand on her hip in true Maggie Lockwood fashion. 

"I KNEW IT I KNEW IT! The chemistry between you two in my eyes always went beyond work. Thats what I have been telling myself at least. At least that feeling was accurate because I totally missed it by a mile with shit head." 

April stood walked to Ethan and caressed his cheek. He kissed her on the forehead. 

"OK April what do you want to do? 

Maggie was ready to get the ball rolling. 

"I don't want to press charges. Don't hate me for that decision Mags. I just don't think I can mentally withstand all the drama of his word against mine. There is no paper trail, no rape kit, no 911 calls, no nothing. I just want to get a restraining order, and dump him. Oh gosh wait until he finds about us Ethan he is going to flip and he has that recording what if he tries ruin your reputation at the hospital!" 

she sat back and put the throw pillow over her face. 

"OK I am lost" 

Ethan filled Maggie in on what happened the morning before. 

"Trust me April Dr. Ethan Choi of the US Navy is the last mother fucker that Tate wants to fuck with. Let's call Voight and get that restraining order ASAP." 

"I agree with Maggie baby, on both counts I also think he needs to be served where he is now that way he can't run right up on you here when he gets back. Not that it matters because I am moving you in with me that is if you agree to it. until all of this is settled, I told you the last thing I want to do is take away your power. Our goal as a couple is to build your control, esteem, and worth back up. So what do you say?" 

Before she could respond her phone rang....


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> April is finally making moves in the right direction.

After the false alarm that was the phone ringing it was Noah filling her in on some family gossip back home in Brazil. She laughed and chatted him up for a few minutes. While she was doing that Ethan called Jay to see if Voight had any free time to see April. Luckily for them Jay was sitting in Hanks office at the time of the call. He agreed to see April ASAP. 

Maggie was working the 4-12 so she headed off to work. Not before demanding all updates and promising to file April FMLA forms when she took her dinner break. April and Ethan headed to the station to get the ball rolling. 

April and Ethan greeted thier extended Chicago family when the reached the top of the steps to the second floor. 

Jay kissed April on the cheek as he showed them to Hanks office.  
April stopped Jay before they went in the room. 

"Jay can you please keep this visit between us please don't mention it to Will." 

He saw the concern and nervousness in her eyes, he also noticed Ethans fingers intertwined with hers. 

"Anything for you April Halstead honor." 

"Thanks" 

she hugged him and he opened the door. Trudy was sitting in the corner of Hanks office eating a bag of chips and chatting up the stats of lasts night hockey game. She greeted them as she prepared to excuse herself. 

"Wait a second Trudy can you please stay? I would feel so much better if you where here please." 

Trudy traded confused but concerned glances with Hank as she sat back down. 

"Sure April no problem I guess." 

Over an hour went by when Jay looked up from his seat at his desk and saw Trudy pacing back and forth. Whatever they where in there talking about surely was not good. 

Hank and Trudy were taken aback and shocked. The 3 Chicago first responders were a family. A family that did what they had to do to save, serve, and protect throughout Chicago. That meant when one of thier own was down or needed help, they were all down and needed help. April explained her views on why she didn't think pressing charges was worth it and nothing the 2 cops could say would change her mind so that had to respect her decision. 

"Where is the bastard now?" 

Hank asked as he grabbed the pen and paper to jot down the info. April gave him every piece of info she had on his whereabouts. He snatched the phone up and got to work. Trudy sat on the edge of his desk and took April's hand in hers. 

"Do not for 1 fucking second let him win. You stop at nothing to overcome him and this. We are all here to be your backbone." 

"Thanks Trudy I have kept this secret for so long it feels like a weight has been lifted off of my shoulders." 

"I have a question April." 

"Would you be open to grief counseling or joining a support group? I volunteer at the women's center we have sessions for abuse, rape, body image issues, AA, NA,and grief. I often refer the young girls I come across here that we bring in from off the street. I know I don't need to tell you guys how messed up these girls are after being abused by thier johns, and strung out pieces of shit boyfriends." 

"Wow that's great Trudy that is a beautiful thing you are doing on top of the responsibilities here, you still have time to give back." 

"Thank you Ethan. It's the same for you guys when you get together and go out to tent city to offer free check ups, and prenatal care." 

"Honestly I never thought of it Trudy. I have gotten so used to burying myself in my work, and using it as my therapy. I didn't even take any bereavement time off from work when my baby died." 

"It sounds like its long overdue baby." 

Ethan reached for her hand as he spoke softly. 

"It goes without saying that everything is confidential." 

Trudy just happened to look up mid sentence and see Kim walk by the window. She instantly thought about how much April and Kim shared they both suffered miscarriages on the job. 

"You never know who you may see or the new bonds you may form." 

"Thanks Trudy you are a lifesaver." 

"On your way out stop at my desk i will give you the info." 

Hanks hanging up the phone brought the trios attention back to him. 

"He will be served at his hotel within the hour. There is no turning back now April. My suggestion is change your locks and anything that is his that you have give it back. Drop it off at a relative place, or put it in storage and send the key certified mail, that way he will have no logical reason to contact you." 

"I can print your copy out when you get downstairs." 

"I will get a call when he is served, you probably will to." 

"Do you have a backup place to stay where he can't easily access you? Its better to be prepared in advance." 

"Yes Hank Ethan opened his home up to me." 

"I live in a very secure high rise condo as far as I know he doesn't know where I live." 

Hank and Trudy extended more help if needed and Trudy walked the couple down to her desk to get the papers April needed. 

They were back in Ethans car. 

"Can we go past Med? I want to let Maggie know how we made out." 

"Only for a hot minute. We have to get you packed up. That is if you agree to staying with me." 

"Yes Ethan I will stay with you." 

Just as she was about to text Maggie her phone lit up it was Tate.


	6. First contact

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The phone call   
> The move  
> The reveal of his feelings

Chapter 6 

She froze Ethan tried to look at her but just his luck he was hitting all green lights. He couldn't take his eyes off the road to gage her reaction to him calling. The 1st time he called she let it go to voice-mail. The 2nd, 3rd, 4th, calls went to voice-mail as well by then they where heading into the Hospital. Ethan held her hand as they slipped into the Drs. Lounge and called Maggie to let her know to meet them in there. 

"He is not going to stop calling babe. Answer it you can't avoid it forever." 

She jumped up off the sofa and without a second thought she ripped off the band-aid and answered, turned the volume down a little and put it on speaker. 

"Hello Tate." 

"Really April that's how we playing you really doing this to me! REALLY GIRL? WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU. I can loose my fucking job. So you going around playing fucking victim? 

"Tate I didn't know what else to do. I had to get you to leave me alone I can't do this anymore. You are getting more and more physical. You have to get help for your grief and anger. It is over Tate I am sorry." 

Maggie slid into the room in the middle of the phone call. 

"He got served I see." 

She whispered to Ethan. 

"Yea everything at the station went very smoothly and she is going to stay with me." 

Tate yelling broke thier side conversation. 

"I know why you're doing this shit. That job took my baby. Now they are turning you against me. So who was it Maggie bossy newsy ass? Or uhhhh Mr. Pretty boy China Chink? What he fucked you real good and turned your little ass out? Huh answer me bitch! Is that what he did? He fucked you better than me so I am out the window." 

Maggie grabbed Ethan as he started across the room to lay into Tate. 

"No she has to do this honey." 

Maggie just remembered to lock the door. The last thing they needed was department gossip running like wildlife. 

"Actually Tate Ethan did play a part." 

She turned to stare at Ethan. 

"I got up the courage to confide in a dear friend and get help. He reassured me, comforted me, listened to me, he didn't push me, hit me, rape me, yell at me constantly. He told me that my feelings mattered, he made me see how lost I was in my shame. I will forever be grateful to Ethan and to My sister Maggie." 

"Fuck you April Fuck you! You think this is ok to do me like this?" 

"Its over T just stay out of my life please." 

"Yea ok we will see how over it is I am on my way back I am cutting this trip short. I have to show you how perfect you are for me and how you are letting them fuck your head up." 

"You are doing the most unnecessary things and I am tired of this IT IS OVER DO NOT COME NEAR ME,MY FRIENDS,OR MY JOB!" 

She didn't even wait for his response she cut the call and blocked his home, work, and cell. She stared at her two best friends. No words were shared they just wrapped her up in their arms. There they stood in the lounge holding April in a group hug. Maggie released April and told her how proud she was of her. 

"Maggie can you cancel the FMLA papers? I would feel much better here with you guys than held up at Ethans by myself." 

"Its a good thing I didn't take my dinner break yet." 

"I have to admit I would feel better if you were here with me." 

Ethan kissed her on the cheek as he held her to his side. 

"I am about to print out Tate picture to all hospital guards so he can be added to the no premises list. You two take the back way and I will see you tomorrow." 

It was close to midnight when they fell into Ethans bed. His living room was full of luggage and essentials that she needed. She even grabbed her stuff out of the refrigerator. No need to waste food she said. They moved fast packed up her car as well as his. The very last thing she did was go online and change her address temporarily to Ethans. Ethan had such an exclusive building she knew she was safe. Ethan gave the guard and doorman a pic of Tate, with Tate full name the retraining order number and instructions to call him and 911 if seen. 

Before they knew it thier long drama filled day was over and they were snuggled in the bed under the floor to ceiling windows that looked out into the sky forever. 

"So this is what a condo view on the 25th floor looks like. I could get used to this." 

"What would you say if I said I want you to get used to this?" 

He leaned in and kissed her on the neck. 

Her light snore told him she was knocked out before he could get his answer. 

"I love you and I will always protect you April Sexton." 

He whispered in her ear and drifted off himself.


	7. Rainy nights

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hot, Steamy, nights in the rain

Her first morning waking up at his place was like a whirlwind. They both overslept, and missed both alarms. Needless to say they hit the ground running. 

Thier day moved smoothly and calm the ED was mostly normal run of the mill cases, it was safe to say the couple had an easy day. 

"How about drinks at Molly's?" 

April asked Ethan while he changed out of his scrubs. 

"Sure I'm down for that." 

He kissed her as he locked his locker and headed out into the evening chill. 

Molly's had the usual 1st responder crowd. Jay and Hank spotted the couple as they slid into a corner booth. April and Ethan greeted the cops from across the room with a wave. 

Ethan went to the bar and asked Stella what Jay and Hank were drinking. He order them 2 more rum and cokes and told Stella that the tab for the 2 men was to be added to his and April's. He ordered her margarita with extra salt on the rim and a beer for himself. Once he returned to the table the new couple sat and talked. April was on her 5th margarita and second shot of tequila and feeling no pain. 

"Its a good thing I only had the 1 beer because you Ms. Sexton are feeling no pain." 

Ethan kissed her he loved the salty lime hints that were on her lips. She felt a instant rush of moisture in her thong. The way they were positioned in the dark corner of the room no one could see her hands. She grabbed Ethans crotch as he hissed in her ear. 

"I never realized how thick your cock is." 

she whimpered in his ear. 

"I need you in my pussy now. Ethan please fuck me. Do you know what I want to do right now?" 

She was a hodgepodge of erotic lingo. 

She asked him as he tried not to melt into a puddle on the floor. He was finding it hard concentrate let alone form words into a sentence or answer a question. 

"What do you want baby tell me." 

He spoke gruffly, as she massaged his rock hard erection. He knew it was the drinks talking. He also knew it was truth in her words and actions. Her inhibitions where out the window. 

"Come on Ethan we have to go now." 

She stood swiftly and wobbly, she thought she was dragging him through Molly's but it was more like Ethan was holding on to her by waist firmly. He got got a wink and smile from Stella along the way. The crisp night air gave him enough of a little jolt to kill his erection much like a cold shower would. It did nothing for April on the other hand it had the opposite effect. 

He stopped her and kissed her hard up against the side of his pick up truck they where parked up the street from the bar. It was a quietness in the air, the only thing either of them could hear was each other's moans and pants into each other's mouths. 

"Fuck I can't drive I have had too much to drink its somewhere I want to take you." 

"Point the direction and I will follow baby." 

He opened her door like a gentleman, and buckled her in. He hopped in his side and pulled off. Within 15 minutes they were parked way up on a hill that overlooked the city. 

"This is my go to hiking path and park that I escape to. I clear my head here I have been coming here for years. Its my special alone place." 

She reached into the backseat and grabbed his survival blanket. Ethan was always prepared for everything. She hopped out of the truck and he followed. There she was laying out the blanket under the bright star lit sky. 

She sat up on her knees and pulled her sweater over her head, and unsnapped her bra. He crawled to her and took her nipple into his teeth he pulled Slightly. She reached down and undid his belt. His pulse in his cock was strong she swore she felt it jump in her hand. She pushed him back so he was flat on his back looking at a zillion stars in the sky. 

"FUCK! " 

he sputtered as he lifted his head and there she was slowly wrapping her lips around his cock. Her eyes where locked on his as she licked her way up and down his dick. The sight was blowing his mind. She fell into a slow rhythm her throat was so deep, no woman had ever taken him so far down before. He was in ecstacy he was propped up on his elbows watching her slobber all over his dick. He couldn't take it anymore he was seconds from exploding in her mouth. 

"Baby please you gotta stop. Please you are gonna make me cum." 

April was like a woman possessed as soon as she heard Ethan say that she sped up she couldn't wait to taste him. 

He sat up and grabbed her hair to pull it back off of her face he felt tingles, hot, cold, all at one time no woman ever brought him this close to the point if insanity. 

"OH FUCK APRIL OH SHIT!" 

His thighs tightened and his fingers locked into fists in her hair as she took in every bit of his cum. She felt him release into her mouth. it excited her to know she had that power to know she could turn him on that much. 

She sat back on her knees and swallowed him while he stared at her in shock. He couldn't speak he fell back as she crawled up him and kissed him slowly. He never thought he would be so turned on by his own taste. April straddled grinding her dripping wetness into his newly awakened erection she reached down and guided him into her seamlessly. 

"Fuck me Ethan fuck my pussy like you fucked my mouth." 

Just as she finished her request the sky broke open and it began to pour she was a fucking wet goddess as she rode him. Her wet long hair was covering her breast he swept it behind her as he sucked on her neck. 

"God you are so beautiful April I can't get enough of you." 

He rolled them over and he was on top he grabbed the other side of the blanket it was waterproof after all, grant it this wasn't the scenario he saw himself using it in. He covered them from head to toe in the huge blanket as he lifted her legs higher and slammed into harder she cried out his name over and over. 

"Damn April you are so wet baby I am all the way in you." 

He panted in her face. I guess we are a perfect fit baby she swept his wet hair out of his face as he reached down and rubbed her clit. She screamed out his name as she clamped down around his dick like clockwork right behind her he came deep inside of the place he knew he would always call home.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> April and Ethan thought they were all alone, they were wrong.

They laid there huddled together wet, sweaty, covered in the smell of sex. They were tucked totally in the blanket like a fort kids make in the living room on a snow day. 

"Do we have to move?" 

She asked as she kissed him. 

"Yes baby we need to get out of this weather and into our warm bed." 

They wiggled and maneuvered as best they could into thier clothes. He quickly hopped over the side of his truck bed and reached up to carry her over the side the rain was a steady downpour as the hurried in the the truck and turned the heat on full blast. She reached over and rubbed his thighs while he pulled off down the dark rainy road. 

What they didn't know was Tate had been watching and following them since they left Molly's thanks to the weather they had no idea he was across the clearing on the opposite hiking trail watching him fuck her. Watching her do things to him that she should be only doing to him. 

1 long hot shower for two and a pizza delivery later they were lounging around talking about everything and nothing at the same time. April phone ringing broke into thier banter. 

"Hello" 

She giggled into the phone as Ethan rose her tank top and licked her belly button. 

"Hello who is calling" 

she repeated herself. 

"Is anyone there? "

"Really April he has turned you into a whore! Giving him that good pussy Fucking him in a pickup truck?!" 

She froze as she made the instant connection. Ethan felt her stiffen he sat up and snatched the phone to put it on speaker. 

"Who is this?" 

He demanded 

"Oh don't act like Mr. Hero war vet Dr. You treated April like a whore but then again that is too good of a word to describe her. She let you take what's mine in that truck tonight. She would never do that for me." 

"You mother fucker you where watching us?!" 

Ethan jumped to his feet and turned 3 shades of red. He knew what he had to do. It was imperative to record this conversation April needed all the evidence she could get. He ran to his work bag , he hit record on his mini recorder that he used for work. He shushed April. 

"Thats low and sleezy as fuck. why would you watch us? The fucked up part is I am military, and I didn't even realize I was being followed." 

"I wasn't stupid enough to follow you to ya house but I damn sure watched you fuck her. Why couldn't you fuck me like that? April I know you can hear me. Why did I have to rape you to get that pussy? You know what don't even answer that because I will have that pussy again. You will suck me and fuck me the same way you did him bitch!" 

April sat stone faced with tears free-flowing, as the line went dead. Ethan immediately called Trudy who called Hank both of them were at Ethans condo within minutes. April was hysterical with fear Trudy had to take her out on the balcony for fresh air while Hank informed Ethan that after listening to the call this was going to be a full case. 

"You will have plain clothes police with you two from now on until he is caught. I do not want you two alone anymore, are you ok with that?"

Ethan ran his hands over his face and looked out towards the balcony at April. He knew he would protect her at all cost.

"Do what you have to Hank please help her."


	9. Her taste

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> April has an embarrassing confession. No worries her man takes care of it.

Hank and Trudy where long gone. Instructions where in place. Sharon was contacted, as well as Maggie. Hank made it clear that Ethan and April wouldn't always know the cops who where protecting them. Sure it could be Kevin and Kim, Jay or Tonio. It could also be the patient in the ED with the sinus infection, or the new lady running the coffee cart in front of the hospital. 

Ethan held April as she cried off and on for a couple of hours. Eventually they drifted off to sleep. He woke to a empty space next to him. He called out for April no response came. He jumped to his feet to look for her. There she was curled up on his balcony with a mug of coffee. 

"Baby you scared me I woke up and you weren't there. Why didn't you wake me?" 

"I didn't mean to scare you Ethan I knew you were exhausted and I wanted you get some rest you do have a full ED to run in a few hours you need to be sharp. Not making mistakes because of me and my shitty situation." 

He slid under the blankets she was wrapped under and held her. 

"You and I both know we can and have handled shifts with lack of sleep. I will be fine. It is you I am worried about. How am I going to work and concentrate on my cases if you are not in my line of sight at all times. April I can't fathom something happening to you. You are my heartbeat, you are my lifeline when I have PTSD and Anxiety episodes you are the only one who can bring me back. When I hear the artillery rounds and bombs in my nightmares its you standing next to me on my ship rubbing my chest, reminding me to breathe. April I am so in love with you. I will lay down my life to see you happy." 

She wiped his face and his tears as she wiped her own she kissed him hard, with everything she had. 

"I am in love with you too. I always have been Ethan. Thank you for showing and reminding me how a man should treat a woman." 

She couldn't get enough of his lips his taste. She kissed and nibbled his bottom lip under the blanket. The nipping and gentle tugging that she was doing drove him wild. She pulled her oversized tee shirt which was all she had on over her head. 

"Baby you know we don't have to do this." 

Ethan spoke in between licks and kisses. 

"I...." 

he stammered through as she took his hand and placed it on her heart. 

"Do you feel my quickened heart rate?" 

"Yea" 

"Kissing and touching you does that to me. I will always crave and desire your touch. You have always turned me on. All you have to do is walk into the room. All I have to do is hear is your voice. Even if we are at work. Just seeing and hearing you makes this happen." 

She placed his hand on her wet pussy. 

"This is what you have always done to me Ethan. Do you see how wet I am? This is the passion I have for you. I refuse to let him stop my passion for you anymore." 

He rubbed her clit and tasted his fingers to taste her. She was so sweet and addictive. He had to taste more, he lifted her and carried her back to his bed. He laid her down and took off his shorts he pulled her to the edge of the bed by her thighs. He was on his knees as she was propped up on her elbows looking at him. He kissed and licked her thighs. 

"Ethan baby wait she spoke slowly I have a confession." 

Her thighs started to tremble as she prepared to bare more of her soul. 

"I dont want to look like an idiot but Nobody ever.... he never...I never had a guy." 

He sat forward and put his finger over her lips. 

"Too bad for them. Well that makes this even more special doesn't it? This is something that I can say I am the only one to give you." 

"Tate always focused on his needs and if I ever brought it up or tried to even the playing field. He would surely make me think twice about bringing it up. He was my first. We where together for so long." 

"What about Kelly I thought you to where high school sweethearts." 

"We where but my parents where so strict I never got up the courage to try anything past second base. When I was in college I met Tate . " 

"Let me taste you April." 

He reached down and touched her she let her eyes roll back into her head as he slid his fingers into her. He slowly wiggled his two fingers in a come here motion working a rhythm. She closed her eyes as he spread her legs wider apart. 

"Sit up for me Baby he growled." 

She moaned and sat back up. She could feel the build up within her but this was different. She couldn't explain this feeling. 

"April baby look at me. I need to see those beautiful eyes when you cum for me ok?" 

She nodded goofly she felt like rubber. Like she was melted taffy and he was her candy maker molding her how he saw fit. 

"Do you feel that April? Tell me you feel me on your GSpot." 

He sped up his pace his fingers where so in tune with her walls it was like his dick was in her. 

"Oh shit Ethan Oh God you are on my spot." 

"Oh I know I am remember I am a Dr. You know. I want to see you cum everytime you cum I want to see those eyes no baby I need to see your beautiful bold latino eyes only looking at me when I touch you. I will only touch you out of love April never out of anything else baby I promise. Do you believe me?" 

She stammered and nodded in the next breath tears burst from her eyes as she cried her thighs shook with fury her whole body seemed to convulse. He kissed her tear streaked face as she came and squirted down his hand. She collapsed back on the bed as he crawled up next to her and tasted her juices from his hand. She blinked away her tears and started to catch her breath. 

He slid back down in between her legs and gently sucked her clit into his mouth. He slowly licked, sucked and brought her orgasm on top of orgasm. 

"Yup its official" 

he spoke as he crawled up next to her pulling the covers over the two of them. 

"I am 100% addicted to you and the way you taste." 

April started to get up and get on top of him. He grabbed her hand as she got up, baby where are you going? 

"Ethan it would be so selfish of me not to pleasure you." 

Ethan laughed as he kissed her. 

" Baby I am already pleased I have you. Thats enough for me close your eyes sleep." 

He kissed her full lips and waited for her to fall into a deep sleep. As soon as she was snoring he crept to his closet took down his gun box. There it was a 3 carat diamond solitare with little sapphires around it. He got back in bed and slid it on her left ring finger and stared at it until he fell asleep.


	10. Ethan is no Superman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> His PTSD & Anxiety get the best of him. Sometimes the hero needs saving.

Chapter 10 

Ethan was glad they were on 3 to 11 shift. It gave them time to sleep in. Even though he was chomping at the bit to see her reaction. He got up around 9ish to take a long shower. He needed to absorb how fast his life was moving. He always knew she was his one but was she ready for this? He was starting to rethink the ring. Not marrying her but asking this soon. She already had enough on her plate. His thoughts were coming in rapid fire. He felt his anxiety flaring up having PTSD & Anxiety always pops up at the worst moment. Was she feeling rushed? She needed stability in her life right now, was he enough? 

He had his own mental issues. Grant it she knew about them, but he was supposed to be her rock. He was supposed to be the man. His insecurities were getting the best of him. He stood under the water from overhead and the jets from the side he loved his oversized shower with a seated wall and water in each direction. For times like this they washed away his fears, tears, and worries. He wanted to believe he was enough he even knew he was, but when his anxiety fucked with him he never felt like it. Enough for his patients, enough for his sailors that he commanded, enough for Emily and the baby, enough for his perfection seeking father,, and now enough for April. 

He slid down the steam filled glass box and did what he did when it became too much. He cried and sobbed from his heart. Very few knew of his mental health issues. He couldn't bare the whispers, stares, or gossip if people really new how weak he could be at times. He curled up with his back to the door and rocked and cried. He was so sad for April. That was also weighing on his heart she was so pure hearted, and sweet. How could anyone hurt her? Her boyfriend no less.

His brain was all over his thoughts where getting faster and faster. Dr. Charles taught him that his thoughts where like racing speeding cars on the highway. Ethan was supposed to let them speed by and not engage the vehicles,to pay the thoughts no mind. That was easier said than done He was so deep in his breakdown he didn't hear the door click shut even if he did hear it he wouldn't be able to see shit for the steam and tears. She made his figure out in the corner knees tucked under his chin. 

She knew of his shower episodes but of course she never saw one. April sat in front of him. She could hear his sobs as she got closer to him. It was obvious he didn't know she was there. 

She called his name several times she was afraid to reach out and touch him without him knowing she knew how his episodes could be. She turned off all of the showers but one on the opposite side to where they were. She could see him thanks to the quickly dissipated steam. 

"Ethan baby its ok I am here. Remember you told me that. Remember you told me hear my voice, focus on my voice." 

He nodded in response. She slowly hugged him as his sobbing slowed. He almost jumped out of his skin. He had no idea she was there. 

"I am sorry I didn't mean to scare you Ethan I heard the water running and I wanted to surprise you ." 

"I am sorry April I shouldn't have done that I am putting to much on your plate when you already have so much going on. I already asked you to stay here, Tate is stalking you and here I am thinking about myself. Trust me you would not hurt my feelings if you said no and told me to back off. I know I am intense and you have been a great confidant about my mental health. It's just that this morning was so perfect what we shared felt so right. I could see us 30 years from now still in love and crazy for each other. I got so caught up in my wants. I slipped it on your finger. Then this morning everything started flooding my mind. April all of my thoughts starting running together and I felt trapped. I am sorry that I am not enough when you need me to be". 

"First of all to me you are perfect. Second I love who I am when I am with you. You helped me rediscover me Ethan. So what you have flaws, so what you can't be strong and a superman 24/7. If I can lean on you, you can surely lean on me." 

She stood up and reached out for his hands. He stood in front of her head hung and back against the wall. 

"They get so fast at times I really fucking hate it. I swear this is not the morning I had planned for us." 

She swept his wet hair off his face and kissed him in between her sentences. 

"I love that you aren't a superman 24/7.   
I love that you are honest about your mental health.  
I love that you want to help everyone.  
I love the way you were willing to raise your nephew without a second thought.  
I love your code of honor and devotion." 

He interjected softly 

"Thank you April for accepting me and loving me. Just promise to never stop even if we don't....." 

She cupped her hand over his mouth. 

"Ethan baby I wasn't done. Its rude to cut someone off." 

"I love the sound of Dr. & Mrs. Ethan Choi USNR." 

He looked at her no words needed to be spoken. He picked her up and hugged her. He kissed her and slid into her effortlessly. They made slow steamy love until the hot water was running out and thier skin resembled that of a prune. They dried each other off in between kisses. They made lunch together and tried to map out a Tate plan of action to know avail its not like they knew his next move anyway. Today was going to be a day full of adjustments but together they were ready for anything.


	11. Chapter 11

So far thier night in the ED was rolling right along. Only certain people knew of Aprils situation. She was trying her best to stay busy during down time. Maggie and Ethan weren't letting her out of thier sight. She knew they meant well, but it was getting to be overwhelming. She texted both of them to meet in the drug closet. 

"Baby whats the matter are you ok?" 

Ethan blew through the doors like a locomotive, and sure enough Maggie was on his heels. 

"Look at you two can you guys please not be so tightly wound? I feel like Lucy when Ricky, Fred and Ethel where waiting for her to go into labor. You two have got to calm down you are really freaking me out. I know you guys want to be there for me, I know you love me. I love yall too, but I am trying not to freak out. I am safe here we have a ton of guards, and undercover. I feel very safe here." 

She took Ethans hands and kissed him quickly. She gave Maggie a hug, just as everyone pagers went off. 

"OK everyone we have a domestic gone really bad coming in CPD just radioed in boyfriend got pissed at home beat his girlfriend, then followed her to work and opened fire" 

Maggie started giving assignments, while everyone stood around gloved up and ready. The first gurney in was the girlfriend luckily not shot but beaten. She went to Ethan and April. 

"Today was my day she whimpered I was finally going to leave and stay with my friend from work. Oh God please don't let her die! She was only trying to be of help." 

She shot up straight as Nat and Crocket rushed by doing cpr on her friend. Ethan was doing his best to work her up but she was so hysterical about her friend not even her own injuries. 

"Ma'am you have to lay still so we can xray your face. Can you do that for me?" 

April pleaded with her. 

"Your eye socket might be broken." 

"Becka my name is Becka." 

She laid back and let April hold her hand while xray took their pictures. Ethan though busy on the other side reading the images was keeping a side eye on his girl. He knew this case would hit her hard. 

"Good news Becka no facial bones are broken. I need you to change into this gown please. April will help you I will step out." 

Just as Ethan was opening the door the booming yelling was rolling by. 

"Where is that whore at BECKA YOU BITCH REMEMBER WHAT I DID THIS MORNING YEA YOU KNOW YOU LIKE IT ROUGH. THATS WHAT YOU DESERVE FOR TRYING TO LEAVE ME." 

"Would you shut the fuck up you dickhead!" 

Jay walked by escorting the boyfriend to treatment. 

" Can you fucking believe it poor girl was in her real estate office and this fuck face just wouldn't let her move on." 

Ethan gripped the curtain in his fist in hidden rage. He looked back at April she was rocking Becka in her arms as Becka covered her ears. 

He gave the women a second to change so he went to check on her friend. He saw the blood all over the hybrid OR, from what he gathered the bullet bounced around but missed all major organs. Nat said she was going to make a full recovery. Thats great he thought to himself. He stood in the corner to catch his emotions, then headed back to April. 

April was busy cleaning Becka facial wounds he watched her work from a gap in the curtain. Just like he figured she was freaked out. He knew all of her tells, her hands where trembling as she dressed her wounds. 

"Hey Ethan before you go in.." 

He turned to see Jay jogging over to him. 

"Maggie said you have the girlfriend" 

"Yea I do I am going in now." 

"We need a rape kit man I am sorry." 

"I figured that I was about to let her know." 

"I will send Kim by to pick it up Thanks man." 

The men fist bumped and separated. 

Excuse me Becka I have good news. Preliminary outlook on you friend is good Dr. Manning said that the bullet missed all organs. She is going to pull through. 

"Thank you Dr." 

"Becka can I steal April for 1 second?" 

He noticed how Becka wouldn't let Aprils hand go. 

"Two things April. First Jay just informed me we need to do a rape kit STAT." 

Before she could respond he moved on to the second thing. he guided her into a empty exam room next door and pulled the door shut. 

"Are you ok baby?" 

He tipped her chin up to look at him. He noticed she wouldn't look him in the eyes. 

"No no I am not" 

She grabbed his hand as she whispered. 

" I can't think about it here I have to keep pushing it down. She could be.." 

She stopped her words and inhaled him in from his hand on her face. He stepped up and hugged her. 

Maggie saw the pair slide out of the empty room she knew this was gonna trigger the new couple. 

"Sorry about that Becka we where discussing something with the police. Becka they need...." 

"Ethan I got it." 

He nodded in agreement. 

She held Becka hand 

"sweetie the police need as much evidence as possible so he never gets to be free again. So I have a question has he ever forced himself on you sexually. If so when was the last time?" 

Becka stared at the blanket with her one good eye. 

"Uhh he was my boyfriend so it isn't rape right?" 

"Wrong. Have you ever told him no? Have you ever asked him to stop? Has he ever held you against your will during sex after you asked him not to? Has he ever been intentionally rough and tried to cause you pain during sex? If any of those answers are yes, then by law it is rape no matter if it is a boyfriend or husband." 

Becka began to sob 

"This morning he.." 

Ethan reached in his pocket started his mini recorder and sat it on the tray. 

When she was done telling them about this morning rape. Ethan gently explained the rape exam to her while April set up all of the tools and the lights. He made sure she knew she could request a female Dr. much to Ethan and April surprise she asked if April could do the exam. April froze as did Ethan, luckily they where on the side of the room with Becka bandage eye. 

April forgot she was a SANE RN. She never had to do the whole exam alone. She had assisted a zillion times. Ethans heart broke for both women,, as he watched April put her trauma to the side for her patient. She put her hands on her hips and looked up at the ceiling to will the tears and the urge to run and barf away. She nodded at Ethan a silent yes he wanted to pick her up and carry her away from this. 

"Actually Becka April is a certified SANE nurse which means she can do your exam." 

She and Ethan switched places and Ethan grabbed Maggie quickly and filled her in she was brought in to console Becka while Ethan assisted April. A hour and a half later her Rape exam was done. photos, samples, DNA, fingernails, std labs where sent off with Kim. Becka was sleeping and Doris contacted her sister who arrived mid exam. Maggie looked up at the clock and saw how late it was. 

"Get her out of here Ethan. I am taking both of you off my schedule tomorrow and Sharon will agree." 

They watched April give Becka sister the resources that she would need. 

Just then April stepped out into the hall as the suspect was being walked out in cuffs Jay had to stop and sign transfers for the suspect at the desk. just thier luck she and he wind up face to face. 

"Damn bitch you fine fuck Becka let me taste you Mami I got something for that ass" 

Ethan ran to help Jay and Kim fight to get him out and away from April. Who was frozen and shaking in place Maggie ran to her side while screaming for security. He was tased and dragged out of ED. Maggie pushed April into the lounge and to the sofa.. Ethan charged in and squatted right to April eye level. He snatched her into a tight embrace. Maggie tapped him on the shoulder. Remember what we talked about. She hugged her best friends and left them to close out her own shift. 

Ethans Perspective 

As soon they got to Ethans she headed right for the shower. He figured she needed her space to process the day. He knew he did, they where probably thinking the same thing. That could be me that could be her and vise versa. He had a boiling over pot of rage in his gut that Tate put there, but after that bastard got in her face that pushed him way over the edge. He needed to let out some aggression sure he could pound into April for an eternity but she didn't need that right now. He went into his closet got his Glock and clips texted April and told her he was going to the range that military and CPD shared and he would pick up dinner or his way back. He was going to mentally plant Tate face on his target and kill him. He knew she was safe at his place. He was so worried about keeping her safe he never once thought about his own safety. He climbed into his truck and headed to the range.


	12. Venting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the day they had, they both needed an outlet separately and then together of course.

Chapter 12 

Aprils perspective 

She couldn't wait to wash off the day. She was definitely frazzled nerves and all. She couldn't erase the fact, that was her. Its like God was really trying to get her attention. She never made a paper trail or reported Tate until lately. She let her shame cloud her common sense. She knew she should have been told someone about the abuse. Her thoughts shifted to Ethan. He completely upended his life in a few short days All for me though. Was that fair? to let Ethan get pulled into her shitty ass predicament. If anything happened to him because of her, she would never forgive her self or be the same ever again. She cut the shower off and got out she didn't want to hog it she figured he would want to use it just as bad so she toweled off and wrapped her hair. 

"Baby I am out you can hop In." 

Thats when she noticed the gun box open on the bed. She threw on one of his Navy tees with nothing else. She called out to him again. Her mind automatically started racing. all of these scenarios popped into her head. She checked her phone as she walked through the apartment. She read his message and felt much better. She poured her self a giant glass of wine. She flopped on the sofa with the bottle in tow and starts channel surfing. A fresh bottle of wine was not a good idea on a empty stomach. She knew she would be drunk, after today who wouldn't be? 

Ethan wished he had a machine gun in his hand he was so mad so fucking pissed that April was in danger, hurt, and disrespected. He tried 24/7 to keep his dark side under wraps. It was the side that Jay and Dr. Charles knew about. The side that Jay has himself, the side that would scare his April away if she ever knew it existed. The horrific things that he had done with his hands and seen with his eyes, all classified of course, and never to be spoken of. He shook as he aimed and fired sure he was here in body but his mind was in a middle eastern war zone. He knew that in his culture boyfriends were held to a level of more responsibility. Yea that played a part in him being so mad. Asian men are raised to protect thier women, and be alpha at all times. Tate was going to see just how alpha I am. Between My sharpshooter training, and my martial arts training, that mother fucker will pay. He already went to the shop in the lobby twice and stocked up more ammunition. 

The light in his booth flashed. letting him know someone wanted him. He stopped shooting and took off his headphones. 

"Hey E"   
  
He turned to see Jay standing there setting up in the booth next to him. 

"Is April ok? I am really sorry about earlier man its been fucking with me like crazy especially with whats really going on with her." 

"Thanks for asking man. Actually I haven't talked to her yet about it. We left our shifts early and I ran right back out the door when we got home, I grabbed my ammo and slid out while she was in the bathroom man." 

"Well by looks of these targets" 

He picked up one of Ethans targets and held it up to his face. 

"Damn E my whole head fits through the chest print-out. Ethan you have to pull it back in man you know that right? I can see it you are teetering on the edge of the dark side." 

He grabbed Ethans shoulder. 

"We can't let it out man, that life we lived over there can never ever cross with this life over here. We will be in jail if it ever did man." 

Ethan fists shook with so much rage Jay felt it in his shoulders. He hugged Ethan tightly. 

"You gotta hold on brother they don't understand what we saw and had to do back there. Now its in total contrast of our lives here now we save lives not take them. I know you where a combat medic but you weren't always were you man I can tell." 

They sat on the bench next to their booth luckily no one else was shooting so they had privacy. 

"I was part of a covert intelligence unit. I would go in and get the intelligence we needed at any fucking cost man. They didn't care man or woman. I didn't stop until I got what I needed." 

He looked at his hands 

"I have taken lives and saved lives with these same damn hands. Right now its hard to keep them separated. Because of Tate. Dr. Charles helps big time but man at this point I think I am too gone." 

"Your afraid of April finding out. or getting your hands on Tate right?" 

"Fucking right I am terrified. Do you know how she would look at me the disgust in her eyes. It would kill me man if she knew I had to torture women. Fingers, fingernails, tounges, electric, and water God I was a monster." 

"We are not monsters. we had a job to do and as fucked up as it was and wrong as the government was for making us do fucked up shit to other humans. The bigger monster is the government man they fucked us up some more than others, and left us to pick up the pieces." 

"3 years of tortured men and women. I was going to loose my mind. Thats when I put in for transfer to a medic unit" 

"I have done some fucked up intell shit to man trust me I know how fast the body can bleed out if you cut too deep in the wrong spot. I was nicknamed the butcher by my team." 

"Damn J we are doozy of a pair." 

Ethan sat back and sighed. 

"You know whats sadder is the men and women out there who can't deal with thier military demons because of the shame they feel." 

"You're right Ethan thats why we gotta stick together man." 

He stood up and shadowed boxed Ethans head. Ethan jumped up and matched the air sparring match. Then he pulled Jay in for a hug. 

"Thank you brother I love you man. Don't ever forget it, you really pulled me back off of the ledge with my anger this time. Anytime you need me Jay you know I am here man." 

"I know thanks E. Go home to your girl she needs you man, you need each other." 

Ethan packed up his gear fist bumped Jay and headed out. He stopped and picked a pizza and a 6 pack of beer.. When he got into his lobby he spoke briefly to his doorman and noticed the plain clothes cops hanging around in the lobby. He didn't realize 4 damn hours had went by. 

Before he even got to his door he could here the Samba music blasting from his sound system, the fact that his system is wired through his whole condo made it even louder. He stopped and smiled to himself at the thought of her body moving in Latin rhythm. 

He stood there in his doorway and watched her hips move in time to the sultry rhythm. He saw the 2 empty wine bottles on the coffee table along with her glass. Yup she was drunk and drenched in sweat from her hard dancing. This was her release from the day they had. Shit he had his and needed hers. He could respect that. She used to br a dancer and times like this you could tell her toned legs and arms, her long hair moved all in time. 

He walked over put the food down,, picked up the remote and paused the music. 

Thats when she noticed him there. 

"Baby!" 

She wiggled and shimmed over to Ethan. 

"You were gone so long i missed you." 

"I missed you to April." 

She twirled around him as he turned with her in the circle. 

"Do you like my moves baby?" 

"You know I do girl. You need to eat. Come on let's put some food in you he held her swaying hips as he guided her towards the food." 

"Nope!" 

She swung around   
"I know something else you can put in me."

Before he could blink the navy tee was on the floor there she stood naked and still moving her body like a sultry belly dancer. Her Latin roots always came out in full force when the music of her people was on. 

"Baby I need you in me." 

she tried to climb up on the island she started to fall of course he caught her. He sat her on the island while he stripped for her and of course as soon as walked off the elevator and heard the music he was hard thinking about her body. 

"Damn I am so hard for you right now" 

he picked her up and sat her on her feet she reach for the remote and turned the music back on. 

"Make love to me baby to the rhythm of my music." 

He grabbed her and wrapped her legs around his waist causing him to slam straight into her walls.its was good thing the music was on because the scream she let out from his sudden entry was booming. He walked them to the glass window that looked out onto his balcony. He fell into the beat of the drums pounding in his ears. The cool glass around her back was steaming all around her like snow angel wings perhaps. He fucked her with so much vigor and energy, and she took it all. 

"Yes Ethan please fuck me harder ooooh please yes yes!" 

She wailed in his ear as she dug her nails into his back her heels bounced off of his rock hard ass. In sync to his stroke. The cool glass made her even more crazy it took her from one extreme of temperature to the other. 

"Fuck April" 

he grunted in her neck 

"I can't stop fucking you" 

She grabbed his face now they were forehead to forehead. 

"You better not stop ever! Promise me Ethan promise me that this dick will always be mine!" 

He put her down still holding on to her she surely had no use of her legs yet. He threw her over his shoulders and carried her to his chaise, laid her down and slid right back into her. Her dancing flexibility was a true turn on. He had her knees back by her ears with not one complaint of discomfort from her. 

"Everything of me will always be yours." 

He took advantage of the loud music and yelled into her ear as he filled her with his seed. He collapsed and let her legs down. He turned the music off and carried her to bed. As he laid her down she curled into his side legs intertwined. 

"That could have been us Ethan." 

She sniffed he felt her tears on his chest. 

"I know April i know" 

"I swear I will never let him hurt you Ethan I swear" 

"No April I don't need you to look out for me. Its my job to provide and protect you." 

"I hate to say this but he has never liked you and has always hated our friendship and as much as I love this and us, I will leave and hide back in the mountains in our hometown Goias Velho to keep you safe" 

Little did they know then that truer words have never come out of Aprils mouth. 

"Sleep baby stop worrying about me." 

They both drifted off


	13. The writing on the wall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The bad guy gets reinforcements. April makes a decision that is not an easy one.

Ethan rolled over to a empty bed he was always a early riser but today she beat him to it. He stretched slightly sore was a understatement but it was a good sore. He got up and put his ball shorts on and set out to find to his love. There she was on the balcony dancing with her ballet shoes on. Damn where does she get her stamina he thought. She danced all of her life. She turned down a dance scholarship for nursing school that she had to take out loans for. Thats true dedication he thought. 

"Where do you get your energy baby" 

he walked out onto the balcony. 

"Goodmorning Honey I was still keyed up from yesterday you know I either run or dance to burn it off." 

"Uh its another way you burn it off April and you are great at it" 

She walked on point to kiss him and grab his crotch. She stood in first position, bent at the waist popped his cock out of his shorts and kissed his perfectly bulbous head. His body almost crumbled with pleasure.

"Why thank you Ethan for the compliment." 

She popped his now hard cock back into his shorts. 

"I can't go running so dancing is the best option. Are you hungry I was gonna have the breakfast of champions left over pizza and coffee. I figured we could lay around until it was time to go in." 

"No can do we have a mandatory day of rest per our bosses orders. I didn't get a chance to tell you last night." 

"Oh ok uh I guess" 

Maggie and Sharon were concerned about us with the case yesterday so we have a paid day. 

She took her ballet shoes off and went to heat up some pizza. He followed her in and flopped on the sofa. 

"Hey April how about we have a cheesy movie day? We can take turns picking." 

"Sure babe I'm down. My first pick is Sharknado." 

"Now thats not fair April because you know we are gonna have to watch them straight through. I want a turn." 

"Ok ok geez you big baby whats your pick for the second flick?" 

He bit his slice and mumbled with a full mouth. 

"Sharknado 2" 

"Omg you know what?" 

She laughed and slugged him in his arm. 

Just then she heard her alarm on her phone go off. She jumped up and ran to the bedroom He followed her. 

"What was that? Thats not your regular alarm tone." 

"Its my alarm for my house." 

Just then the phone rang. 

"Hello yes this is Ms. Sexton yes my pin is 1476 what's wrong?" 

She turned and looked at Ethan. She mouthed get dressed as she started to thrown on clothes on top of her dance leotard. While she listened intently to the caller. 

She grabbed her wallet and keys as he was tying his last shoe. She grabbed his wallet and keys for him and was out the door running to the elevator. With him on her heels. 

"OK thank you I am on my way." 

They stepped into the elevator as she started to speak. 

She whispered kind of in a daze 

"Someone broke into my fucking house." 

He grabbed her and held her. 

When they got there cops where already processing the scene. They walked in her sofa was slashed, her photos on the wall where broken, upstairs was ransacked. As far as she could tell nothing major or valuable was missing just thrown about. She walked to her dresser her mirror was smashed. Suddenly she noticed It, Her underwear and lingerie drawer was completely empty. 

"Hey I need the photographer in the 2nd bedroom!" 

April and Ethan hurried to her second bedroom where Voight was standing. 

"He is escalating and he isn't working alone guys the neighbors description did not match Tate." 

Jay interupted 

While April read the walls in shock she instinctively touched her stomach and covered her mouth with the other. 

One wall read you took my baby from me  
The opposite wall read I will take him from you! 

"April I know we covered this before but I need to know every detail about Tate we can't figure him out tell us everything you know" 

Jay and Kim waited for her response. 

She walked around her bare room in a daze. When did this become her life? 

"This was gonna be my babies nursery." 

"He is fucking with me why did he write on these walls in this room?! Why this room Ethan why in my babies room?!" 

She sat on the window seat and sobbed into her hands he knelt in front of her, and held her. Kim choked back tears this hurt bad she and Adam just lost thier baby 6 weeks ago. 

"How about you guys get out of here and we will stop by in a few hours." 

"No Jay damn it I am sick of him or them or whoever it is fucking with me. He stole my underwear, he threw MY DEAD BABY in my face, and he is threatening ETHAN! I am doing this now!" 

She turned to Jay and Kim. He is an IT genius he is... was one of the best hackers in the country the circle he ran in was almost placed on the FBI watch list when we were in college. He even tried to hack my admission into my dream nursing school, I talked him out of it. He never really broke any laws but he skirted in the grey area. He knows how to go off grid and deep underground. we broke up when I left for nursing school. It was like he vanished into thin air. Suddenly 3 years ago I was back home in Brazil for our family reunion and boom there he was in a nightclub my cousin and I were at. We got back together from that point. Any of his underground buddies could be helping him. He can be scarily intimidating. He has ways of doing things without you knowing. 

She told his background story while looking out of the window. She suddenly turned to look Ethan in the eyes. 

"I should have never dragged you into this Ethan. He can ruin you. He could hurt you. How could I be so selfish." 

She took off his ring, placed in his hand. She caressed his cheek. 

" As much as I love you, Until this part of my life is fixed I can't let you be pulled down with me." 

She ran from the room and to her car and sped off with Kim right behind her.


	14. The background of Tate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jay Kim and Ethan finally get Tates full history. April realized she can not run anymore.

"WHAT THE FUCK MAN WHAT THE FUCK!" 

He punched the wall in frustration. 

"Why is he doing this to her? She is so perfect and kind and smart man she doesn't deserve this!" 

He sat on the window seat and put his head in hands. 

"Kim is tailing her she is not alone. Just give her time man she loves you." 

April pulled into Ethans parking lot she was surprised she could see through the tears. Kim pulled in right behind her. No words where spoken all the way up to the apartment. 

Kim followed April into Ethans bedroom she started packing her things. Kim sat on the floor legs folded like a little kid. 

"I am going back to Brazil. " 

"If he found you there once he will find you again. You are key to this investigation you can not leave." 

"I have to get away from Ethan. I am putting him in danger." 

"He is an adult April you are not putting a gun to his head. He wants to be there, he loves you." 

Ethan saw April and Kim's car he instantly felt a little better knowing where they were. He heard the voices from the back of the apartment. He made a stiff drink and flopped on the couch. 

April think about this. Where are you going to go because Brazil is not the answer. April sat on the bed and sighed. She rubbed her stomach again. Kim turned towards her and took a deep breath. 

"You keep wondering what they would have looked like, what they would smell like after a bath, how thier cry would sound, would they look like you or thier dad, who's personality would they have. You stay up at night with a brain full of questions that will never be answered. Yea the dad is hurt but a part of you is no longer in you. You had a life in you and its snatched away without your fucking permission." 

"Thats exactly how I... wait how do you?" 

"I just came back to work 2 weeks ago. Adam has been very supportive even though I know he blames me. I should have waited for backup but I had to save the endangered girl so the 3 min wait was not an option. I got my ass kicked by the guy, I kicked his as well and lost my baby in the process. So yea April I know." 

"I also know that you need to stay still and let us and him help you. Running will fix nothing." 

"Kim I am so sorry I know Adam was freaking terrified." 

"Yea he was but he also gave me my space to grieve and vice versa." 

"Did Tate make you loose the baby?" 

"Not directly no" 

"He says its the job.   
Then it was me not getting enough rest.   
Then it was I fucked Ethan and   
Got rid of the baby to hide my blasian secret." 

"That last accusation is what changed him. Thats when the rapes started. I wasn't ready to have sex yet. I was so heartbroken and leading a double life. Smiling and pretending at work and being fake, when i was so miserable inside. Everything was trash talk the hospital. Staff events were his Mr.. perfect act, but he would make me pay later on. Then it happened, I called out for Ethan in my sleep for the first time." 

"I guess your subconscious dream state knew what your heart wanted." 

"He raped me the first time. I was in shock, i was a rape victim. His mantra was I have to let Ethan know that you belong to me. The first time he raped me that day Ethan and I pulled a double shift I was so happy. To be at Med with Ethan I felt safe. In the back of my mind however I wanted to run and hide as much as I loved Ethan and was in love with him back then I was terrified to be touched by him that whole 18 hour shift. I froze if he got too close or if we brushed up against each other, I felt like Ethan would be mad at me for knowing better, or mad at me for letting him hurt me." 

"You know what boggles my mind Kim? I am not afraid of Ethan. Like most textbook rape victims are. Our sex life is insanely amazing. Its like I come alive at his touch. We never had to explore what the other person likes or anything. Now in contrast I couldn't stand the thought of Tate touching me. Between the pushing, hitting, the name calling and then the rapes, how could I ever think about being with another man?" 

"First your heart left the asshat relationship. Thats why you didn't want to be intimate."  
"Second your heart was already with Ethan. Thats why you can give your body to him so freely without answering right hesitation."  
"Third why are you walking away from the perfect man?" 

"Oh God" 

She looked at her naked hand 

"I really fucked up." 

"Naw I doubt it." 

Kim looked up and saw Ethan in the doorway, behind April. 

"I really doubt your moment of frustration can run him off." 

"Kim stood up and hugged April." 

"Do you have to go so soon? I really don't want to be alone." 

"I have to dig into the info you gave us so I have to get going. Besides you are not alone." 

She gave Ethan a hug as she maneuvered around April luggage. 

"I can show myself out." 

April wanted to melt into the carpet. As he walked towards her. 

"The next time you are going home is for our Brazilian destination wedding and honeymoon Mrs. Choi." 

He kissed her nose as he started to put her stuff back. 

"I am sorry I am so afraid of him hurting you I tried to push you away. When I saw the walls I freaked." 

"Of course you did who wouldn't I don't blame you." 

She rolled her luggage back into his huge walk in closet, then stood in the closet doorway. 

"So you heard all of the fucked up details huh?" 

"Not if you didn't want me to no." 

"No thats not it. It was kind of refreshing to get the whole story out. I just didn't want you to know how much of a roll you played in my abuse. I didn't want you to feel guilty." 

"Can I be honest April?" 

"Please yes" 

" I am angry that you where right by my side day in and out and I never saw the signs. I am trained to notice things. I was so busy trying to not cross the boundaries that we have to abide by on the job that I didn't see what was right in front of me. I had wanted you for so fucking long I think I didn't let myself see what was wrong for fear of you rejecting my feelings because you were with him. Think about if I approached you and said April I am in love with you, and Tate does not treat you good enough in my eyes. Would you have had the courage to confess your secrets right then? I can say I always got a vibe off of Tate. I didn't like his mannerisms when we were at gatherings. I just couldn't sit on it anymore. When Mags told me about your call out I had this nagging in my head. I had to see you I had to prove myself wrong." 

He grabbed her around her waist to pull her chest to chest and face to face 

"I wanted to be wrong." 

He closed his eyes and let his tears fall. 

" You were already in my heart, I wanted you in my arms, and in my bed April but I was afraid of being shot down so I kept you at arms length in the friend zone." 

"But I swear I never would have imagined this was what you were going through baby. I am so sorry. I will never forgive myself for missing the signs." 

She wiped his face and put her head on his chest. 

"See thats the thing I kept it so hidden i don't think I gave you signs to pick up on except being afraid of your touch, after he raped me. I know you would never hurt me. I was afraid of being exposed to you and not living up to your expectations of me. I feared loosing your respect." 

He kissed her hard with tears and all. 

"You were so fucking wrong. This whole situation does the opposite. I have crazy respect for you. Look at all that you juggled." 

"I want to spend the rest of our lives showing you that." 

He undressed her with kisses in between as he spoke.. 

From me April 

"Your body will only know love"   
kisses on her neck   
"Your heart will only know love"  
Kisses on her nipples   
"Your hands will only feel pleasure"  
Places her hands on his chest 

He ripped his clothes off. 

Then he picked her up and carried her to bed. He slid right into her slow and easy. He took his time with her body. He made slow sensual love to her. Showing her body everything he had in him. She cried from her orgams over and over. The more she cried out his name, and came the more he had to fill her.. it was like he was getting a sex high from her arousal. He came in her walls 3 times before his body collapsed from exhaustion. They were so connected that they fell asleep with him still inside of her.


	15. Reserve weekend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Its Ethans reserve weekend and April is alone

"I think you were right April. He doesn't want to be found. I am sorry Voight can't justify anymore manpower on Tate. He hasn't made a peep in almost 2 months." 

April listened to Kim on the other line. While she paced slowly in the Ed Dr. Lounge. 

"I know I can't expect the unit to only focus on me. I am so grateful for all of the help. We just have to get used to looking over our shoulders." 

"Are you coming to group later?" 

Kim asked 

"Yup I actually look forward to it." 

"Ok see you then." 

April didn't fall apart like she used to she knew he was gonna disappear underground. She got up to return to her shift her break was almost over. She and Ethan where going strong in a comfortable place. She missed him it was his reserve weekend. Between Maggie and April she was pretty much never alone. She got her house repaired and gave it to Noah temporarily. She finally told him about Tate. He needless to say was shocked and pissed. She didn't give him all the details just the superficial break up drama parts and of course if you see him or anyone strange around the house call 911. 

Ethan worried so much he convinced April to apply for a gun permit with Jay and Kim backing him up she couldn't say no. He showed her how to shoot and handle his glock. She was a natural. 

End of shift rolled around quickly and to her surprise Kim came strolling in ED to pick her up. 

"Hey Maggie is April almost ready?" 

"Hey girl yup she is changing." 

"Hey Kim I could've met you there I was gonna hop in a lyft." 

"And talk to me the whole ride there ain't that right little sister? 

"Yes Mags" 

She hugged Maggie and headed out with Kim to thier support group. 

Group went great it was so refreshing to be with women who got it. Kim was riding up to the apartment to check it out she promised Ethan she would. 

"You want to hang out ? I am so bored and I am off this weekend which is a good thing. I can veg out in front of the TV. Where its safe." 

"I am sorry I can't Adam and I have a thing tonight." 

"Awwww thats great Kim you guys are trying to work it out thats awesome." 

Kim did her walk through like she promised and gave April a hug. 

" Remember call if you need anything." 

Like clockwork the I pad on the counter was ringing. Thats my man girl gotta go Kim laughed and headed out. April ran to lock yhe door and pick up the tablet. 

"Baby I miss you so much!" 

"Hey beautiful I miss you too!" 

They laughed and caught up for over an hour. It felt like months when he was only gone for a day and a half so far. 

April wound up falling asleep on her call. Ethan didn't want to hang up he wanted to watch her sleep. He left Thursday and wouldn't be back until Monday night. It felt like a lifetime. 

April did exactly what she said. She got a crap load of comfort food delivered and watched old sitcoms all weekend. She didn't hear from Ethan anymore. Her girls checked in on her from time to time. Before she knew it, it was Sunday night and she looked a mess she took a long bubble bath, put on her little silk robe it was one of his favorites. Next she cleaned up and made dinner for one. April turned out the big overhead lights and lit her candles all around the bedroom 

She sat down to eat and watch Tv. Thats when she heard something. It sounded like someone in the outside hall. Thier apartment was at the end in the corner of the hall so nobody had any business down that far in the hall unless they were coming into this apartment. She sat her pasta down and grabbed the glock off of the dresser. She flicked the safety off blew out the candles and hid In the nook by the kitchen. She was trembling and trying to not breath but breath all at once. 

She could see the main hall lights shine into the dark apartment. 

"OH GOD THEY GOT IN" 

her mind raced with fear. She didn't even care she was half naked. She aimed at the figure as it advanced past the doorway. All thoughts ran through her mind. 

"Was it Tate or his buddies?   
Was she going to be raped again?  
Was she strong enough to pull this trigger?" 

The figure moved closer into the apartment into the dark and closer to where she was hiding. She tried to steady her hand and put as much bass in her voice. 

"DO NOT MOVE OR I WILL FUCKING SHOOT YOU! SHE COCKED THE GUN" 

The gun cocking sound was deafening in the silence. 

There was no response just a series of muffled mumbles. She crossed the pathway to the kitchen wall with the light switch slowly never taking her eyes off the dark figure in the middle of the room. She flipped the switch and almost fainted, there he stood. 

"OH GOD" 

She screamed there he stood, looking like a military god in his dress uniform. Duffle slung diagonal across his shoulders, two bottles of champagne one in each hand, long-stem roses under his chin, and house keys in his mouth. 

Tears welled up as she put the safety on, set the gun on the counter and ran to him. 

"BABY WHAT THE HELL OH MY GOD I ALMOST KILLED YOU!" 

She took the keys and flowers and put them on the table, as he sat down the bottles and took off his bag. 

Ethan didn't say a word he just snatched her up. His heart was in his throat. When he held her she could feel his pounding heart. He could feel her heart as well. The both froze in each other's embrace. They both knew how tragic this could have been. 

"Ethan I am so sorry." 

she shook as she spoke 

"I got so scared all I heard was someone messing with the door. I was in the bedroom and I grabbed the gun and hid. Why didn't you call me?" 

"I wanted to surprise you. I had it all planned out. I got done early, baby I even called Mags and asked for tomorrow off for you so we can spend the day together. Baby I am so fucking sorry. My hands were full thats why it sounded the way it did." 

"I am so sorry" 

he took his jacket and hat off. He scooped her up and held on to her for dear life 

"I am so sorry April I shouldn't have done that." 

She shook her head no repeatedly as she clung to him. 

"I am the one thats sorry. I could have I..... thats my biggest fear something happening to you, but at the hands of me Ethan I would die." 

He kissed her tear stained lips. Still holding her around his waist. He walked to the bedroom and put her back on her feet. He undid the silky knot that hid his womans perfect body. She watched him undress like a flash they were all over each other. 

"Mmmmm Ethan I missed you I hated being alone." 

He picked her up and slid into her effortlessly as the laid on the bed he loved making love to her. 

"Baby thinking about this body. Let's just say its a good thing I am in command. I have my own bunk because jerking off was the only way I could get to sleep at night." 

He continued his slow stroke. 

"Fuck you touched yourself for me Ethan? Did you cum just for me? " 

She panted in his face as he stretched her legs farther apart. She moaned out into his neck as he shifted slightly in one direction for a new sensation. 

"Hell yea baby all for you only you." 

"Show me Papi Chulo I want to see you touch yourself." 

He sat back on his knees and watched her suddenly get up and go to one of her dresser drawers. She fumbled around in the dark on the far side of the room, before coming back to bed with a towel in tow. She turned on the lamp. He could feel a low hum as she spread her long legs and sat up against the head board. 

"Do you want to see me touch myself Papi?" 

He nodded stupidly while she lifted her legs, she began to push out a big hot pink silicone egg. His eyes almost popped out as he stroked his cock. She reached down and attacked her clit with her index finger and fucked herself with the toy. 

"Do you like what I did while I was all alone Ethan?" 

He was in a trance. 

"Ethan answer me or I am going to stop fucking myself " 

"Yes yes please fuck yourself for me." 

His strokes got faster and more rhythmic, and she did as she was told. 

"Ohhhhhh I am gonna cum Papi" 

She screamed as she squirted all over his cock and the towel that was under her for obvious reasons. She didn't even realize he moved up to be right in front of her. 

"Oh fuck April baby your so warm and wet its all for me baby?" 

He yelled her name as he shot his load all over her spent pussy." 

He collapsed on her and rolled her over so he could hold her. 

"Welcome home baby" 

she mumbled as she drifted off. 

He mumbled a thank you. He would give her his news tomorrow.


	16. Ethan shares

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After all this time Ethan finally let's April in

He woke to the smell of bacon. He hopped in the shower and made his way towards the heavenly smells. April was singing in her native tounge as she fluttered around the kitchen. Her roses where in the vase making a nice centerpiece on the kitchen table. 

He slid his arms around her waist. 

"Mmmmm Goodmorning baby" 

She turned to kiss him Goodmorning. She made bacon, biscuits eggs and fruit . They sat down to eat when April realized she still didn't know why he was there so early. 

"Baby we have to talk." 

"Uh yea why did you come home so soon? Baby I still have chills when I think about what could have happened." 

"Yea me too let's just shelf late night surprises until we have a normal life." 

"I want to explain why I am home so soon." 

"I had a incident yesterday and Dr. Charles was called for consult. My base Dr. and Daniel agreed that I need to go on paid long term convalescent leave until I get a handle on my PTSD." 

"Ok uh do you want to tell me what happened?" 

"April there are parts of me that I work really hard to keep hidden from you." 

Before he could digress she looked at him like he had 3 heads on his shoulder. 

"Please don't look at me like that it's not what you think baby." 

"You tell me that you are purposely hiding a part of you from me. How else am I supposed to look at you Ethan?" 

Ethan pushed back from the table. He walked to her and took her hand. 

"Baby I want to share all of me with you. Its just that some of the things I keep hidden because I am afraid of being judged and pushed away from people especially you." 

"Ok i get that, but what does that have to do with the incident you had?" 

"I was supervising a training exercise and it was a hostage scenario. Well the hostage was one of my female officers she is black." 

"Ok sounds ok to me." 

"The volunteer who was the assailant had dreadlocks. and he played his role so fucking well that when he grabbed officer Rutledge, its like I lost it. All I could see was Tate hurting you. I blacked out I didn't come out of it until I was in the infirmary begging them not to call Emily and to just page Daniel. They talked and he informed them of my outpatient status. So they both signed off on my leave. When I talked to Daniel on my way home, he made me realize that maybe if I let you in on the cause of my PTSD maybe I can handle it better." 

"So I invited him over so he can help me explain it." 

He paced across the room and stared out onto the balcony. 

"Oh fuck it. I invited him because I am afraid to tell you. Plus creepy Tate out there somewhere plotting his next move, I was pretty much a ball of exposed nerves this weekend." 

She put the breakfast dishes in the sink and walked toward him. She hugged him from behind and laid her head on his firm taught back she rubbed her cheek on his back and let her hands run up and down her rippled stomach and chest. 

"Ethan there is nothing you can say that would make me shun you. I love you. I am your future wife." 

He turned and hugged her as he talked above her head. Jay has also been supportive of my demons. He has really been there. Look at me April its not that I don't trust you with my issues, thats the farthest thing from the truth. My fear is loosing you, disgusting you, scaring you. What if I blackout I would die if I lashed out at you in a flashback or a trigger." 

"Ethan I have seen you in those moments I would hope I would be of help. If I can't then I know who to call or reach out to. Just like Dan and Jay help let me baby. I promise to try my best to help you." 

His phone ringing interupted the couple. 

"Yes did you check his ID ? Yup let him up Thanks Ken." 

April opened the door and hugged Daniel. Ethan walked over and gave his friend a follow up hug. 

"Please have a seat. You guys talk I will get the coffee." 

"I am so proud of you taking this step this is major Ethan." 

"I am terrified this totally goes against my natural personality." 

"Of course it does. Don't you know thats what love does. It pairs us with someone who has what you need to work on or lack its the natural balance my friend. She needs Love , protection, and compassion. All those things you brought into her life. Now you on the other hand, need to feel like you won't be deserted, ostracized, and loved unconditionally. She is the one to give it to you. The right mate makes you want to change for the better. Tate didn't do that for her just like uhhhh whats her name didn't do that for you. Think about man what lover have you ever let this far into your life?" 

"None" 

"Exactly " 

April opened up the balcony to let some fresh air in while they sat and talked. 

"Before we start April I have to inform you that whatever Ethan says to you in relation to his service to this country is strictly classified and can not go outside the 3 of us. This conversation is highly classified." 

"Ok I won't say a word to anyone. I will respect the sanctions of course. 

Ethan got up to pace as he talked and she and Daniel listened and sat quietly. He broke down examples of the horrible things he had the duty of doing. The torturing. And abuse he inflicted. The women he could still hear screaming and wailing as he abuse thier human rights. The bloodshed he saw, the begging and pleading, and eventually the answer would come spilling out. Some in thier last breaths some not at all. 

He went to get a beer actually 2 he had to burn off the jitters he had. He chugged the beers and then went to do the breakfast dishes. April had not said a word. He was scared to death. 

"April are you ok?" 

"Uh yes Daniel I am ok I guess. I ... feel horrible though." 

She reached for tissues and started to cry. 

"Its not fair. He has been walking around trying to save the world because he feels he needs to balance the score for all the wrong he has done. He carries that demon 24/7 plus work and now me and my shit, plus he still serves his country. He deserves a medal of fucking Valor for juggling all of that." 

"What can I do to help him?" 

She cried quietly and listened intently to what her dear friend told her. He told her what signs to look out for when it came to panic and flashbacks. He was a wealth of information for her. She shared the shower incident and how he didn't know she was there momentarily. 

"I think you two should talk he only needed me if you where against this or afraid and in both cases I am glad to say you are neither just like I knew you would be." 

he hugged and kissed her cheek. 

"Congratulations April on the engagement. Remember call me day or night for you or him." 

She thanked him and showed him out. 

She turned to lean her back on the door and eyed the room for her man. Yup he was still her man and would always be her man. 

She walked into the bedroom he was sitting on the floor against the bed working on his 3rd beer. Dhe sli! Qd down on the floor to sit by him. She popped open a beer and took a chug. To him the silence was booming he couldn't take it. She on the other hand was comfortable with the quiet. 

"You really torturedp people?"  
1 is 5b z  
He have to ss;, did What you had to do. It was your job. Its not like you are some serial killer, Doctor By day and serial killer by night. Ethan I am so sorry. I am so sorry that you have been carrying this burden all alone for so long." 

She took his beer and hers and moved them out of the way. She sat in his lap,and picked up his head so they where eye to eye she wiped his tears with her thumbs. 

"Can you do me a favor Ethan?" 

He nodded slowly and sadly 

"Can you let me help carry that burden? I mean I think its rather greedy of you to help carry my asshat of a burden but I can't help carry yours."

"So you aren't freaked the fuck out by my dark side?" 

"Actually I am honored, you chose me to be the lover you let in." 

He hugged her and held on to her she was truly his everything. 

"Jay was right. See with past relationships it was never meaningful. Never soul to soul. Sure it was fun and social but never this." 

He touched his heart and then hers. 

"What about The Ms. Vicki. She worked for the VA and she was military. Damn she should have been your go to." 

" Ha your funny she was all about airs, prestige, superficiality and image I am broken therefore not good enough." 

"Well shit I owe the bitch a thank you." 

"Wow" 

"Yea she is a bitch I almost died and lost my mind running back in ED to get the meds to save you, and as I get word that you where awake I run to your room and there she was in your face. I saved your life and there she was reaping the benefits of watching you open these gorgeous eyes." 

"Yea ok she won that round but you got the grand prize" 

He kissed her slow. She melted and felt him growing under her. 

2 hours later they where in the bed a entanglement of arms and legs. Usually he held her after they made love. This time she was the pillow for him. 

"You always say April let me take care of you, yea well its time that someone takes care of you." 

His head was on her stomach. She was playing in his hair. 

"April do you want to have more kids?" 

He felt her breathing change. He looked up at her. 

"Uh I" 

She was surely not expecting that question, that was for sure. 

"Baby I am sorry if I caught you off guard. I was just curious about it. No pressure of any kind whatsoever, if that's what you think." 

"When it first happened and he changed on me I started the birth control because I refused to be linked to him for 18 to 21 years. Honestly I never thought about it because I knew I couldn't bring a life into this world living like that. Now a baby that would have a loving, kind soul like you as the father, that is a wonderful scenario I can get behind." 

He kissed her stomach and laid next to her. 

"I can't wait to watch our baby grow inside of you." 

She kissed him and smiled. 

"I have 2 requests only." 

"Anything April" 

"I want to be married first, and I want the Tate situation to be over and done with." 

"I agree baby" 

They spent the rest of thier evening talking about what they thought thier babies were going to be like.


	17. Let the planning begin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The girls invade Ethans place as the wedding planning begins.

The couple resumed normal schedules with the jobs that they loved after thier 3 day weekend. Well they tried to, he was still looming somewhere. Waiting to make his move. Even if she felt safe at work she always had it in the back of her mind. They would be busy with thier patients whether apart or together. it seemed everytime she looked up she caught Ethan staring at her. The looks would never linger, just a second to solidify wellbeing from across the ED. 

Days turned into weeks turned into 3 months of no contact from Tate. She started to wonder if it was really over. She wanted to start planning her wedding. She knew in order for thier family and friends to make it to Brazil to be in or attend the wedding she had to let them know well in advance for moneys sake. She and Kim sat on the balcony jotting down stuff in her bridal planner. So far her girls and guys where lined up. 

Maid of honor was Maggie  
next was Nat, Kim, Emily, and Stella. 

Best Man was Jay  
Next was Will, Adam, Kevin, and Kelly 

They knew they were asking a lot of thier parties especially with this being a destination wedding to South America of all places. They all agreed to participate and with the notice being so far in advance they were sure to get the time off, and have ample time to save up. 

By the time Ethan got in from work his living room was a flurry of bridal magazines, wine bottles, and pizza boxes. Natalie, Maggie, Kim, Emily, Stella, and his April were all laughing sitting around and talking wedding stuff. 

"No wonder I couldn't find you two at Med." 

He pointed to Mags and Nat.

He laughed as he put down his bags as April came to him for a kiss. 

"I am sorry baby she said in between kisses. We wanted to go to Mags but we figured it would be safer for the girls to come here." 

"No need to explain baby, I agree." 

"Hows everything moving along?" 

She took his hand and led him to the sofa. 

Maggie popped open a beer and gave it to him. 

"So baby nothing is set in stone. I just wanted to start this as a way to look forward to something positive thats coming ya know? One definite is my Tia and Tio agreed to put everyone up at there villa. We can have the wedding there or at the beach right behind thier property. Baby it is amazing I have plenty of pics to show you of the property. There is plenty of space for everyone." 

"The rest is girlie stuff hairstyles and flower ideas for our hair." 

Kim chimed in 

He scrolled through her pictures on her phone. She wasn't lying. The grounds where breathtaking. It looked like a botanical garden mixed with the Garden Of Eden. 

"It looks like paradise, April I love it. " 

She hugged him from behind around his neck. Her breath was right on his collar bone. Of course he tries to play it cool.. She walked around and flopped down next to him. He nuzzled her neck as she giggled as she sipped her wine. The couple got lost in scrolling through the photos again on her phone. Maggie started cleaning up the glasses and bottles, while the others gathered up all of the books and magazines and put them back in Aprils huge storage tote labeled The Big Day! The ladies quietly gathered thier things and crept out of the door. Ethan just happened to glance up to see why it was so quiet. 

"Hey where did....." 

Before April could finish her phone buzzed in her hand. It was a text from Maggie in the bridal group chat all of the girls where in. 

"Good friends know when to exit stage left lol. Go enjoy your man" 

She smiled as he stood up and walked into the back of the apartment without a word to Ethan. He quickly followed after he checked the locks on the door. April left a trail of the clothes she was wearing. 

Not long after making love, they were snoring wrapped around each other. Until the phone woke April she tried to squeeze her eyes tighter to sleep harder. Yea right she thought that will make it stop. She reached over Ethan to find her phone in the dark on the nightstand. He wasn't there his side was empty. She thought very little of it he was in the bathroom thats all. 

"Hello" 

She mumbled noticing the time said 2am. 

"I said hello damn it who is this?"

Just by the silence she knew it was him.


	18. Ethan are you real?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Has Tate returned to stir up trouble again?

She jumped up to get Ethan at the same time yelling into the phone for Tate to leave them alone. 

"Awww thats a shame you really think your hero noir was there with you. Sweet sexy April that simply can not be." 

She ran from the bathroom, to the office which was really the second bedroom, to the kitchen, and finally the living room where she stood in tears. She panted into the phone. 

"WHAT DID YOU DO DAMN IT WHERE IS HE?!" 

"He is right here tied up like a good little hostage waiting for you of course." 

Before she could process her words Ethan yelled out. 

"BABY DO NOT COME HERE ITS A TRAP. APRIL I LOVE YOU. DO NOT COME HERE PLEASE STAY AWAY!" 

"You want him to live? You come" 

She collapsed to the floor in the middle of the dimly lit living room. Her body was limp with shock. 

She lost her power in her voice. 

"I need the address." 

She whispered as if to say if I don't talk normal toned then it isn't real. 

"APRIL BABY LISTEN TO ME STAY AWAY!" 

"I just text it to you. You better come alone and uh wear something sexy. On second thought it doesn't matter what you wear its coming off anyway." 

All she could do was sit there and scream and cry. 

"I have to save him" 

she kept repeating out loud 

Her shaking became more intense as she sat on the floor. She knew she had to get up but she couldn't move. 

"APRIL APRIL APRIL!" 

Ethan turned on the lights and continued to shake her to rouse her from the very intense nightmare she was stuck in. All he knew was she started calling for him repeatedly. Her arms where covered in goosebumps. He swept her hair off of her face. 

Just then her eyes popped open. She jumped up on her knees. 

"NO NO NO I HAVE TO SAVE YOU! TATE TOOK YOU!" 

Ethan got on his knees face to face with her grabbed her and held her. 

"April I am right here Tate didn't do anything baby listen to my voice remember the voice we are here in our bedroom alone and safe." 

Her struggles started to subside. She reached her hands up to his long hair and run her fingers through it. She pushed out of the hug and grabbed his face she rubbed his cheeks and held his face as she searched his eyes for a bit of reality. 

"You wanna tell me about it." 

She got up and paced as she talked in true Ethan style. She told him everything that happened. He listened intently as she swore up and down that it really happened. He took her hand and walked her to the front door. Next he opened up her phone to show her the call log. 

"See nothing no Tate tonight. Come on let me make you a drink to calm your nerves." 

She threw back the shot of tequila swiftly quickly followed by another. She reached for the bottle to pour another. He grabbed her hand. 

"Whoa baby we have to work in a few hours. The ED with a hangover is a no can do I need my nurse sharp. He kissed her nose. 

She sighed as Ethan sat next to her. 

"He has laid low for so long your nerves and imagination are fucking with you baby. I am here he is not I love you baby." 

"I felt trapped like I couldn't do anything I need air." 

She got up and walked out onto the balcony. The wind made her hair dance around her head like a brown cloud. The chill instantly hardened her large brown nipples. It definitely caught her attention and gave her a pleasant shiver. She took a deep cleansing breath as his arms slid around her from behind. 

"Do you feel me holding you? I am here." 

He walked her to the high railing to look out over the night skyline. His wall and railing came up to Aprilsunder breast. He slid right into her from behind. 

"Do you feel me baby? 

She leaned back into him as she relished in the feeling of being in this moment. He slammed into her as she held onto the railing. Her nipples rubbed on the chilled metal. He pulled out of her suddenly and turned her around. He picked her up and carried her. He laid her on the patio bed and slid right back into her. 

"Feel me baby touch me." 

He grunted in her face. She cried as she pulled his hair and Dug her nails into his back. He bit her shoulder gently. she screamed his name over and over as he pounded into her. She rolled them over as she needed to be on top of him. She took him in so much deeper when she rode him. He reached up and pulled her nipples as she bounced on him. He made sure to heighten all of her senses. 

"I feel you Ethan OHHH I FEEL YOU so deep in me." 

He tried to hold off as long as long as he could. He felt his orgasm storming forward like a dam about to break. 

"April I am going to cum so fucking deep inside of of you he panted." 

She shook her head no. 

"No No No baby you can't yet please Ethan." 

Suddenly she jumped off of his pulsing wet cock, fell to her knees and took his hot load into her mouth as he sat up on his elbows and looked at her in an amazed stupor. He yelled out as she pumped his cock into her mouth. He grabbed the back of her head. She was like a woman possessed. He couldn't stop even though he had finished Cumming he was still hard. He never had that happen before. Staying hard immediately after release. She cupped his tight balls and kept them warm in the chilled air. 

"Fuck April oh shit your mouth is ohhhhhh you are so ohhh." 

He stopped trying to form sentences as he looked up at the night sky. Explosive synapses where happening behind his eyes. He felt a chilled breeze blow across his slobbered covered cock he looked down to see where her mouth disappeared to. She started to softly suckle his tight balls. She reached up and wrapped her hand around his shift as she pumped his cock, she took turns licking and sucking his large shaved sac. Never had he felt this much pleasure from one person at one time. 

"April I am going to fuck!" 

He felt it coming again building up his balls tightened up in her mouth, then in the next second. She was gagging on his cock as she took him as far as she could the change in sensation was enough to push him again. He shot his load all over her hard nipples as she rubbed it in like lotion. She sat back on her knees as he picked her up and laid her down. He got up and grabbed a blanket out of the cabinet where he kept his outdoor supplies like charcoal and citronella candles. They snuggled under the blanket as he kissed her head. 

"I needed to feel your realness as much as possible." 

"You can feel as much of me as possible whenever you need to."


	19. Rio Baby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rio here they come let the fun begin.

That nightmare still haunted her even now a year later since Ethan first showed up at her doorstep that night. She often wondered where Tate was. She was so consumed with work and planning the wedding from miles away she rarely thought of him anymore. She was so grateful for her aunts and cousins back home they video chatted her every second of her free time to get her approval on everything from flowers, linens, music, the menu, cake. She would fill Ethan in and together they would make the decision.

Her mom and her girls had all of the dresses picked out and shipped priority. The Tuxedos where shipped as well. They were all flying out 2 weeks before the wedding. She really wanted her Chicago family to be immersed in her homeland so they where going early to play and be true tourists. 

The gang all had the same flight Ethan, Jay, Emily, April, and Noah where the only ones used to extended flying. Everyone had on thier matching Tees and support stockings. Her parents where supposed to be there, but her dad had emergency gallbladder surgery the week before so naturally her mom stayed back to care for him. Noah naturally stepped in to give her away. They promised to Skype the ceremony for all of thier friends who couldn't attend. To make up for missing the big day, they upgraded all of the bridal party to first class. When the arrived at the airport they where greeted by a concierge who escorted the whole gang to the first class lounge. 

April tried to explain all the way through the airport that there must have been a mistake. When they reached the lounge Ethan hopped off the golf cart first. 

"Excuse me Dr. Choi?" 

"Yes can I help you?" 

"You have a call on the courtesy phone follow me." 

"Uh ok" 

"Baby I will be right back." 

Ethan returned a few minutes later. 

"Baby what was that about?" 

"That was my father in law. He said as an I am sorry for missing the big day we have all been bumped to 1st class courtesy of my mother and father in law!" 

Everyone cheered as waitresses brought out champagne and finger foods. With in the hour they where in the air in their own recliner pods complete with TV and phone and curtain for privacy. The group was so big they literally had the whole cabin to themselves. They took off and everyone settled in for the night. As luxurious as the cabin was, no one could really sleep so everyone chatted in small groups like kids on the school bus on a field trip. April was on her knees explaining something in Portuguese to Kim, Noah was doing the same with the guys. 

Eventually everyone wound down after several bottles of champagne the bridal party tuckered out for the night. 

April was awakened to small peckers on her neck. 

" Rise and shine baby I want us to see this sunrise together its my first South American sunrise after all." 

She smiled stretched and took the bowl of fruit from his hand he reached over her and pulled up the shade. They shared the fruit as they looked out over the bright orange and pink sky. 

As they desended over her homeland she, Emily, and Noah pointed out different things on the landscape. 

"Hey Sister in Law whom I love so very much." 

She smiled at Emily as she plopped in Maggie's seat next to Em. 

"Yes Sister in Law whom I love so very much." 

They linked arms and laughed 

"Since you lived here for a year is it ok if put you to work to help me play tour guide for the girls. Noah has the guys but I know with the final touches happening I might not be able to do it all." 

"Sure Sis no problem. Just let me know what you need honey." 

She hugged Emily she was so proud of the woman she turned into. 

"Ladies and gentlemen please buckle you seatbelts as we prepare to descend into the beautiful city of Rio De Janeiro where today's high temperature will be a steamy 101° Welcome to Galeão International Airport." 

"See ladies aren't yall glad we changed into these tanks and shorts?" 

April laughed as Ethan whispered how glad he was that she changed. 

When they left the first class lounge the skycap already collected all of the luggage they all followed him to the street exit. To thier suprise, the majority of she and Noah's cousins and thier childhood besties from the neighborhood where standing there with giant signs that read Dr. & Mrs. Choi and flowers for the bride and groom. Squeals and shrieks where abound as the siblings greeted the family they hadn't seen face to face in years. 

Everyone loaded into the huge white party bus that her uncle lended to them free of charge it was huge. 

"Whew I am so glad Tio owns a limo company Sis. This saved you guys a big chunk of change." 

"Tell me about it." 

She noticed Ethan was kind of quiet amid everyone else's excited chatter. He stared out of the window as not to miss a thing he saw. 

"Baby are you ok?" 

She held his hand in hers and leaned into his side. 

"Yea babe everything is great. I was just taking all of this in. You are truly from paradise. That is saying a lot considering I have been all over the world, but this is way different. This is not Defense Department. This is truly lesiure and I am brave enough to admit its gonna feel a little weird to me." 

She kissed his cheek. 

"Let me show you how to be carefree baby trust me you need it and deserve it these 2 weeks are going to rock your world Ethan in more than one way." 

"Oh really now." 

he leaned in for a kiss. 

"Yup especially the secret get away I have planned for just me and you. NOBODY KNOWS ABOUT IT. That is just a lil note for you to file away." 

She leaned in so her lips grazed his ear as she whispered. 

"My walls will not be the only ones knocked down on this trip." 

He squirmed from the seductive statement she made. 

"Well since we are in a surprising type of mood Missy, wait until you see your wedding gift from me to you. Let's just say big things can come in small packages." 

"Ethan honey that's not true. You do not wear a small in scrub pants I would know after all." 

She kissed him as he laughed into her mouth and the bus drove through a huge wrought iron motorized gate. 

"We are here guys!" 

She and her brother yelled simultaneously.


	20. Crazy Rich Brazilian

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ethan really sees how rich the Sextons are

Her Tio and Tia showed everyone where they would be sleeping they had the cutest little bungalows that could easily pass for pool houses complete with bathroom and a little kitchenette area. Kim and Adam, Stella and Kelly, Nat and Will had the 1 bedroom bungalows. Kevin and Jay, Maggie and Emily had the 2 bedroom bungalows. Noah and April stayed in the main house in thier own bedrooms. Thier aunt and uncle had the 2 rooms remodeled since it had been years since they slept in them. Ethan walked into thier room and opened the balcony doors. He stepped out to take in the amazing view. 

"Couldn't you just stay here forever?" 

She asked as she slid her arms around his waist. He nodded in agreement. 

"The pics do not do this estate any justice. Explain to me again why you and your family moved to Chicago? Because there is no way I would want to leave this if I where you. I knew your family was well off but damn April its like you guys are the South American version of Crazy Rich Asians!" 

"I know right we are well off yes but if I didn't come to the windy city how would I have found you." 

"Good point" 

They kissed and she turned to go back into her room. By the time they took thier showers and unpacked the maid was calling them for dinner. A huge buffet was set up by the pool for everyone. 

Hours later everyone had eaten, laughed, danced and wandered around getting to know the lay of the land. By sunset everyone's jetlag was kicking in, they all turned in. 

April and Noah worked on an activity newsletter that would be given to everyone in thier group everyday at breakfast. It consisted of all of the tourists options in the area, fun facts about the happy couple, historical tid bits about the town, any local numbers or business hours they may need. She wanted to make sure everyone had time to themselves. She didn't want to smother them with non stop wedding things or taking control of all of thier free time. 

2 days after thier arrival the gang spent the whole day at the beach. Everyone except April and Ethan. Operation walls come down was about to begin.


End file.
